Sexual harassment

[Alleo]

You aren't groomed from an online game, and 18 is an adult. You know better at 18.

Thats completely ignoring that people in online games can feel like real life friends too and can turn into great friendships and more. So I am not really sure how this cant happen in a game? Also not everyone is completely stable. Come from a bad family and suddenly that nice guy that compliments you looks like a beacon of hope. Have low self esteem, mental problems like depression or aniexty or just generally have gone throught something bad and feel down. Its exactly those that this guy went to. And we are not talking about a few sentences and they did everything he wanted.

Stuff like that takes months. Months full of being friends with someone, being worshipped and yet slowly also isolated from the rest. So yes you can be groomed throught online means because friendship cant just happen in real life.

[Zsolen]

Thats completely ignoring that people in online games can feel like real life friends too and can turn into great friendships and more. So I am not really sure how this cant happen in a game? Also not everyone is completely stable. Come from a bad family and suddenly that nice guy that compliments you looks like a beacon of hope. Have low self esteem, mental problems like depression or aniexty or just generally have gone throught something bad and feel down. Its exactly those that this guy went to. And we are not talking about a few sentences and they did everything he wanted.

Stuff like that takes months. Months full of being friends with someone, being worshipped and yet slowly also isolated from the rest. So yes you can be groomed throught online means because friendship cant just happen in real life.

I never said people could not feel like friends. That does not impair a person's judgement. She made the correct judgement, intially.

[Seig345]

I don't know about that... an 18 year old might know better than a 14 year old, assuming the 18 year old goes through the same things the 14 year old eventually will... just like a 28 year old knows better than an 18 year old (again assuming the 28 year old actually experiences what the 18 year old eventually will)

Age doesn't automatically bestow experience, it just means you've been alive longer and were statistically more likely to have experienced more things. Culture shock isn't something that only happens to 14 year olds, it's adults experiencing new things in a new place where the local adults had experienced it for most of their lives.

My point being there's no age where you just *poof* automatically know better in any given topic, let alone emotional abuse.

[Zsolen]

I don't know about that... an 18 year old might know better than a 14 year old, assuming the 18 year old goes through the same things the 14 year old eventually will... just like a 28 year old knows better than an 18 year old (again assuming the 28 year old actually experiences what the 18 year old eventually will)

Age doesn't automatically bestow experience, it just means you've been alive longer and were statistically more likely to have experienced more things. Culture shock isn't something that only happens to 14 year olds, it's adults experiencing new things in a new place where the local adults had experienced it for most of their lives.

My point being there's no age where you just *poof* automatically know better in any given topic, let alone emotional abuse.

18 is way past the mark of knowing better. Even 14 is past it. In fact, this person clearly did know better, but changed course. It was deemed the socially acceptable option.

[Okamimaru]

Saying anyone should know better because of age is foolish... what about people who are on the autism spectrum? They don't always understand social interactions the way most of us do... and we have plenty of players who fit on the spectrum... are they just supposed to know what they are getting into? And God knows 14 yr olds can't make important decisions and few have any foresight whatsoever... how many 14 yr olds would you trust with a handgun? Or your car? And let's try to remember the emotional hormonal nightmare going through puberty was...

[Aellae]

The lack of both comprehension at first and then empathy second, and also the amount of people thinking themselves beyond abuse and fault while being absolutely narrow-minded about the lengths to that people that want to harm others go is astounding. After chiming in every now and then I hope this thread dies down soon because a few people share some really questionable insights and it makes me lose any leftover hope for mankind.

Opinion is all good and dandy but maybe a few here should sit down and think first before actually typing a response, especially considering the sensitivity of the topic.

[Melichoir]

Opinion is all good and dandy but maybe a few here should sit down and think first before actually typing a response, especially considering the sensitivity of the topic.

Or you know, you could jsut say "Hey,thats your opinion man," and leave it at that if you disagree.

Some people are just expressing t heir views. Not every view is great. But I take issue with this sentiment of "Think before you speak about sensitive subjects' as of late because it gets used as a means to stop people from expressing their views. It comes down to "Oh I dont like what some people are expressing. They shouldnt say anything unless they think it through (aka, they shouldnt say anything unless its closer to my world view)."

But hey, thats just my opinion, man.

[Solarra]

I honestly don't think victim-blaming is helpful.
It takes the spotlight off the abusers and places responsibility on everyone else not to be abused. That seems backwards to me.
Of course people should take steps to protect themselves, but people have varying degrees of experience and may not always see the danger signs, especially in a social situation where the person doing the harassment has lots of friends, a good reputation in the community, or is in a position of power.
In my experience abusers often choose people who are vulnerable in some way and exploit that vulnerability.

When dealing with issues like this as a FC leader, the first thing I do, without exception, is encourage people to report and then use all the tools they have at their disposal to put distance between them and the person harassing them. However, it's not always enough, the tools we have are not perfect and since it's relatively easy to find someone in-game, even if they change their name, the abuse may not stop.

I think the most helpful response to the issues raised by The Moogle Post would be to:
- consider if we as a community (both players and Square), are doing enough to send out the message that sexual abuse will not be tolerated and to support the victims.
- look at the tools available to people experiencing harassment in-game and see if we can add to them or improve what is already there.

[AriaFairchild]

Poor Square, having to deal with balancing the game, creating new content, policing people who dare hurting other's feelings...now having to deal with players' shenanigans that happen outside the game.

[Rubiss]

Poor Square, having to deal with balancing the game, creating new content, policing people who dare hurting other's feelings...now having to deal with players' shenanigans that happen outside the game.

Square's involvement should begin and end and enabling players to block each other and having GMs who will look into players who harm the community. Anything else is just silly. Sexual harassment alerts? Movements? Unnecessary.