Firstly, it's not a false equivalency, because I wasn't equating the consequence. I apologize if I wasn't clear enough in my wording to indicate that. I was using an example to illustrate just how absurd permanent strikes are. In this context, I don't view real-life examples as problematic.
Secondly, I can appreciate your standpoint, and I respect it. We're all entitled to our own opinions. That said, I think it somewhat sad, personally, that you are willing to accept draconian rules for a bit of politeness when there's such a large middle ground that would allow for both. SE's approach prioritizes politeness, true, but it does so in an exceedingly harsh fashion. There are better approaches that would enable more of the community to participate, while also preserving politeness.
Finally, membership to the forums - and its value - can vary depending upon the user. Your membership may be trivial to you, and that's fine. Truth be told, it's relatively trivial to me, too. But my boyfriend and, I suspect, many others on these forums, do not find their membership to be quite so trivial. For these individuals, the stress imposed by the approach that SE takes to moderation is regrettable, to say the least.
I don't view it as an issue of blame, myself. Of course, at the end of the day, we've only ourselves to blame. The rules are there, and they can be followed.
Rather, I view it as a customer service issue. SE has certainly had these in the past. I remember having to recover my FFXI account years ago - I'd lost my security token somewhere along the line. Recovering it required I sit for a couple of hours waiting to get through to SE's customer service, necessitating in turn an extended lunch even, because their business hours were completely overlapped by my work hours at the time. Obviously were I seeking to blame someone in this scenario, well, it's my fault - I could have kept better track of my security token. But it was also bad business on SE's end, bad customer service. I nearly just gave up and didn't bother renewing. I'm sure there are others who went this route, people who weren't willing to put in the effort.
So that's the vantage point I'm coming from. SE could do better.
PS - I've been making an intentional effort to avoid mentioning the litany of exceptions to 'the rules' that have occurred, but I feel it bears repeating. Like I said, my boyfriend was perma-banned after a second strike, both exceedingly minor. There are numerous stories of this, where an email for the second ban will come in, and then at the end, when it's supposed to be up, a perma-ban notification comes in for some unrelated past post that was also reported. Posts are sometimes weaponized by groups of individuals who collectively feign offense in order to draw moderator attention to someone with an opposing viewpoint. A healthy moderation system should not react to such instances, but it happens here. Sometimes, SE's approach to moderation very much is to blame, and the punishment is not warranted - but there remains no meaningful appeals system. Worth keeping in mind.