[Suggestion] Make "remove from friends list" 2-way

[MOZZYSTAR]

/post

That sounds like a bit of a scary situation! I'm sorry you had to go through that. If it ever happens again (hopefully it won't), it sounds like you know how to handle it from your end at least. Perhaps changing characters was for the best anyhow, even if all that work was lost.

[Sukocat]

nor was I thinking clearly enough at the time to get screenshots to handle the situation properly

I'd like to point something out that's helpful. Probably too late a year later, but helpful within at least a few months of the incident. In your game files, there's a file that saves your chat logs. It's in your character folders (thought it's difficult to find which one if you have multiple characters, since they're not labeled by name, just by character ID). Although, I wouldn't be surprised if that ID corresponds to your character ID on the Lodestone. Anyway, even if you don't get a screenshot of the incident, you can still find logs of the conversation, and GMs can still look that information up. They probably have logs of it server-side as well.

[Enla]

I'd like to point something out that's helpful. Probably too late a year later, but helpful within at least a few months of the incident. In your game files, there's a file that saves your chat logs. It's in your character folders (thought it's difficult to find which one if you have multiple characters, since they're not labeled by name, just by character ID). Although, I wouldn't be surprised if that ID corresponds to your character ID on the Lodestone. Anyway, even if you don't get a screenshot of the incident, you can still find logs of the conversation, and GMs can still look that information up. They probably have logs of it server-side as well.

Bit too late sadly, but I'll definitely remember that for the next time. Thank you for the handy tip. ^^

[Sukocat]

Confirmed: Sadly, the char folder in your game files does not have the same number as your character on the Lodestone. What I did to find which was this:

All files in a character folder have a 'Modified' date, so log in game, change something in your character's config, note the date and time you did it, then go through your char folders to find the file modded for that date and time. Profit.

[KisaiTenshi]

A few months back, I removed some people from my friends' list but I discovered I was still on their friends' list as they were able to send me moogle mail (to which I couldn't reply to because they weren't on my friends' list). My suggestion would be to make the removal of a friend two-way, as in... if you remove a friend from your list, you'd automatically be removed from their list as well. Yes, you could block them but sometimes these things aren't enough to warrant a block.

I get the sneaking suspicion that Cactaur server has become the drama server. Just look what happened in that 4K dps thread.

Had a similar incident after someone I thought was my friend turned the creep factor up to eleven and I removed and blocked them for their behavior. The second I had the courage to clear out my block list and change the name of that character a year later I got an instant message from that person, making me decide to shelve the character once more rather than allow that person to track me unhindered. If I remove someone or even block them, I shouldn't be on their friendslist anymore.

I'm sorry to say this, but the only way you get away from that is by deleting the character. The Lodestone id's are the same even if you rename. More to the point the game's own internal data consistency never changes the ID either. So you might try to hide by renaming your character, but as long as people use third party tools, you're not hidden at all. If you want to get away from drama, you absolutely have to delete the character. But even that will not get you away from the drama if you've posted even once on the forum.

Click on anyone's name on the forum, and it will show you what other characters they have. And then there is also things like Reddit and Discord that you can't hide from either. So I don't know what nonsense took place on Cactaur to warrant people asking for this, but the internet does not forget.

It seems like the latest few threads about wanting to block users from playing, from being seen, and from being messaged inside and outside the game pointing to some drama that the rest of the forum wasn't a party to, but someone is bringing it to the forum to try and get SE to change how the game works just to fix something that people should talk it out over.

[ShadowHunterrX]

Only wondering. You guys are talking about one sided deleting, so doesnt the another person even know that some of you guys are offended/creeped out in anyway. Did you say even *Sorry, but i gonna block you or not going to be friends anymore* or is it more like * didnt like what you said and just deleted/blocked* without even saying it. Some people didnt know they did anything wrong so for some they see a old friend again.

I have exp in both these things.
- Like being befriend with someone while being in the same FC, but when they leave you are suddenly no friends anymore and ignore you. Even if you helped them 3 days before.
- i have been kicked out once from a FC in sneaky way. Not blaming the other side, i was wrong too. But was stll in there LS for 3 years. But got kicked for being.....active. I just helped people and talk with them. But someone was clearly still butthurt after 3 years. ( please dont hold a grudge, just ignore the person )

[MOZZYSTAR]

I get the sneaking suspicion that Cactaur server has become the drama server. Just look what happened in that 4K dps thread.

Hate to point it out, but a.) that comment is not constructive in the slightest and completely uncalled for. You should not generalise an entire group of people based on two things you've seen. I would say this is stirring up more drama than my own comment. b.) 4k DPS thread is irrelevant to this one (personally not following it, don't care about it), c.) my own comment wasn't meant to be dramatic as I have no issues with the people I removed from my list. I just wasn't fond of the fact they could still moogle mail me when I can't moogle mail them. d.) I hail from Jenova, my friend.

Please don't blow things out of context and make assumptions. Thanks.


Edit:

Only wondering. You guys are talking about one sided deleting, so doesnt the another person even know that some of you guys are offended/creeped out in anyway. Did you say even *Sorry, but i gonna block you or not going to be friends anymore* or is it more like * didnt like what you said and just deleted/blocked* without even saying it. Some people didnt know they did anything wrong so for some they see a old friend again.

I'm not entirely sure what you're saying... If you're asking if someone is notified whether or not they were removed from your friend's list or added to block, then no they're not unless they're sharing a house together and they happen to be online. It shows up as something "X is no longer sharing a house with you," etc. (But even then, that doesn't necessarily mean they unfriended you.)

As for the latter... I would say it depends on the person. For me, I just remove people I no longer regularly game/dungeon/raid with, et cetera. No falling outs, just naturally drifted apart. I don't see the point of keeping them on my friends' list if we don't game together. I don't notify them (and they likely didn't notify me).

I don't think I can comment on your experience, other than I think it's fairly common that people stop associating with each other after they change FCs (which is a shame. :/ Tried to make it work out plenty of times before myself, but to no avail).

[Rockette]

I dunno. This "feature" has helped me out a few times. I've had FC members fall out with the FC, name change, then attempt to get back in to troll or stir drama in other linkshells. Since they don't get removed from friends list I can see that it's obviously someone I know, then its not hard to figure out.

I can see both sides to this discussion because of that.

[ShadowHunterrX]

Snip

I said the first things because some peeps said being creeped out. So if that is one sided, 1 party still think in a friendly way.

I totally agree with you on the rest.

[KisaiTenshi]

Hate to point it out, but a.) that comment is not constructive in the slightest and completely uncalled for. You should not generalise an entire group of people based on two things you've seen. I would say this is stirring up more drama than my own comment. b.) 4k DPS thread is irrelevant to this one (personally not following it, don't care about it), c.) my own comment wasn't meant to be dramatic as I have no issues with the people I removed from my list. I just wasn't fond of the fact they could still moogle mail me when I can't moogle mail them. d.) I hail from Jenova, my friend.

Please don't blow things out of context and make assumptions. Thanks.

Ahem. Virtually every drama-generating post on the forum has been created by someone, often the same person, on Cactaur, and the same three or so people who also play on Cactaur fuel those threads by harassing everyone who comes to those threads. So no, it's not a generalization, they are literately disrupting the entire English forum over petty raider nonsense. So your thread was ill timed because it was posted just three minutes before some drama exploded (that thread is now 26 pages.)

Anyway, as I said on the other half of my comment. The game internally tracks id's and the ids do not change even after the server reboots or is patched, because the lodestone id's do not change. Removing someone from the friendslist, mutually friend removal should only be done if the removal is done with a harassment report, because that is the only justification for it. Other people just clean up their friends list because people haven't logged in quite a while and/or know they quit, but wouldn't mind seeing them again.

Like seriously, if SE wants to improve the friends list at all, put a "archived" tab into the friend list, and anyone who hasn't logged in in 30 days gets moved there automatically. Likewise if someone has unsubscribed, move them there automatically. Then once players are moved to the archive page, it's the same as not being on the friend list, and the game doesn't ping it except when you look at the archived list, but you can add them back to the active friend list at any time.

It's not what you're asking for, but would remove some awkward situations where people were removed due to clean up, not drama, but people will always think they did something to get deleted. When I played a different game, I had to clean up friendslists daily by the dozens because popularity comes at a price. Who do you delete? Those people you delete will think you're being a jerk to them (even if they haven't logged in months), those people who you don't add, think you're being stuck-up, etc.