Gayorzea: Discord Partner community for LGBT FFXIV players

[Hunky]

Sorry If I didn't answer your questions. You can ask them again if you like.

I derailed it by saying I don't want to join?

You did kinda come off as self-righteous. This is just a simple, "hey come join if you'd like" kind of thread. This is not a "do you believe lgbt designated linkshells are necessary" kind of thread. The purpose of the thread was to invite people and let people be aware of the linkshell. If you're not interested in joining, you don't have even have to bother posting. But your post came off as a sort of judgment call, that people who join the linkshell are isolating themselves and you're above that.

Why do you feel the need to do that? People say how linkshells like this is "flaunting sexuality", but I see people flaunting the idea that, "I'm gay, but I don't need a linkshell like this."

I see what you mean. I'm gay, and I'm not waving rainbow flags everywhere I go (not that there's anything wrong with that to be honest, live and let live, who cares?). I don't rush to join every LGBT thing out there. I'm currently in an LGBT-friendly fc, and I only joined because a good friend invited me (and the people are actually really cool). But the three fcs I was in before were all non-LGBT. So I see what you mean. I'm also an LGBT person who doesn't actively look for LGBT stuff. But what I don't agree with or understand is the attitude you're giving about the linkshell. Yeah, there's definitely more to all of us besides our sexual orientation. Absolutely. But, I won't deny that it is important. I mean, a person's sexual orientation can have an impact on a person's life. It's that important. It might not have an impact on everyone, but it can have an impact. Depending on stuff like social environment and all that.

I remember when I first played call of duty online on the ps3. I heard so many gay slurs. To be honest, it didn't really bother me because I knew those guys were long-distance jerks but it did make me go, "Dang, how am I gonna make good gamer friends?" When I did meet gaymer friends, I really appreciated it. I mean, it was cool. It was cool playing with other gay guys. Fighting games, fps games, all of that. This was back in 2009 or so. It was definitely different back then. People are more open-minded and accepting now, but that doesn't mean that there aren't people out there who could use some fellow gaymer friends today.

We gotta remember that there are still parts out there, even in the USA, where it's tough trying to be openly LGBT without being given crap by others. One of my gaymer friends recently came out and he was kicked out of the house. Had to be homeless until another relative took him in. This stuff happens. I'm not saying you're unaware of these things, because I know you've been through stuff too, like me. I'm just trying to make the point that there's good reasons why people wanna join a linkshell like this, and it's not to isolate themselves from non-LGBT people or to "flaunt their sexuality". It's to find others who you know won't judge you or give you a hard time while trying to enjoy the game. For some people, a linkshell like this is a chance to meet people like themselves. And that's a cool thing.

And I don't agree with the idea that being in an LGBT linkshell is isolating yourself. I'm in an LGBT-friendly fc and I've made plenty of non-LGBT friends along the way, mainly because there are also other linkshells you can join and other ways to meet cool people.

"Hey guys, there's this cool linkshell if you wanna join if you happen to be LGBT or LGBT-friendly." This is what the OP pretty much said.

"Oh, don't invite me because I don't box myself in like you guys do." That's how your post comes across. You might say we're reading into it but the implication is right there. So joining or wanting to join an LGBT linkshell is alienation? It creates a sense of "us vs them"?

You came in with this sort of combative, resistant attitude when the OP is just trying to invite people to a linkshell.

And then you say, "Oh but it's just an opinion. It's my opinion. I'm only sharing my opinion." Yeah, but that's not the purpose of this thread. There's a difference between sharing an opinion in a relevant discussion and posting an unnecessary opinion in a thread that's not trying to initiate a discussion on a certain topic.

The reason posts like these bother me is because they trivialize/minimize the reasons why people want to join linkshells like these, and they end up making people look crazy or weird for wanting to join a linkshell like this. And that's not ok, because there are legit reasons why people would want to join a linkshell like this. Maybe you don't think it applies to you, and that's fine. But why do you have to come in with a negative attitude like that?

[PandaMonium]

I actually think that the reason behind this really innocent "Hey, I made a new "X/Y/Z" Discord for those who interested" thread got this amount of pages this time, is that times have changed drastically indeed. Let's not take the "I live in the middle of nowhere" reason on account right now but agree that the gaming community (FFXIV) nowadays don't give a damn about anyone's sexual orientation.
The OP would get exactly the same amount of pages of "They can advertise whatever Discord channel they want" / "They shouldn't advertise an X/Y/Z Discord channel that is not related to FFXIV on the game forum" if they would make a "Hey, I made a new Discord for those who works in banking area / gather old stamps / have pet iguana and plays FFXIV".

Imagine for a second that the OP made a Discord channel for banks workers that play FFXIV and there are posts like: "I don't agree with the idea that being in a banks' workers linkshell is isolating yourself. I'm in a banks' workers-friendly fc and I've made plenty of non-banks' workers friends along the way, mainly because there are also other linkshells you can join and other ways to meet cool people."
Sounds kinda funny, right?

LGBT community fight for their rights went a very long way and guys may be proud imo when getting asked "Why do you have to make this special channel, what's wrong with the regular game related ones?" It means that there's already a new generation of young adults who don't remember how it was 10-20 years ago and you can start to get off of your guard

[Danyawl]

If I ever enter these debates seriously like my last post it's because there's people that aren't affiliated in anyway that offer us support & encouragement. As a mod there I feel some responsibility to contribute to that. If that applies to you then I'm sure I speak for all our members when I say thank you. It really does mean a lot.

Otherwise it's only with humour 'cos as you can imagine I have said these things a billion times already & I was never here for a fight, only to let people know that if they want a community like what I described then they're very welcome.

Gayorzea isn't new either. We've been around for 2 years, have thousands of members & are supported by big companies like Discord & other non-LGBT communities and popular streamers. If we don't have to fight them then we certainly don't have to spend time fighting people here over silly shit like: "why do you exist, it's a massive imposition to me & I just felt some ardent relentless need to put this down"

[Antonio_Xul]

As I read the rest of this entire thread, I'm starting believe that the problem really isn't the whole Discord thing, but about constantly broadcasting about LGBT things. I think people think that it's not something that needs to be a thing that needs constant reminder and are tired of hearing about it like parsers, Viera, the male bunny suit, etc.

It's like how they say at work to not to talk about politics, religion & money. LGBT is a bit political and people want to get away from politics and other touchy subjects when they play. It's not fun and only brings arguments.

I understand that you guys want have fun, too, and don't want to be treated poorly in game, but unfortunately no matter how much finger pointing and shaming you do to the ignorant hater, you won't get rid of all of them. People have been hating on each other for thousands of years and will continue to do so as long as differences exist. It is something we have to adapt to and try to avoid getting hated on. One way to adapt is to not bring it up, especially if it's a polarizing view. I understand that when you get friendly and close, personal stuff pops up, but you have to judge whether it's safe to bring up your polarizing view or not. I don't know how many friends you may have lost in game, because of this, but it would've helped not bringing it up and say "I like to keep my private life private, please".

Just my opinion on what I think is happening.

[Nedkel]

Maybe rename this discord for something else like.
Rainbow Eorzea.

[Parodine]

snip.

I'm sorry, but history has not been kind to those who simply shy away from polarizing opinions in defense of others. I'm sorry if you find the 'lifestyle' is being shoved down your throat, but ya know, you clicked the link? You commented twice? You're shoving it down yourself.

If it's not something you're interested in, just move along, mate. It probably won't go down as deep if you do that.

snip

This pretty beautifully summarizes things.

[Antonio_Xul]

I'm sorry, but history has not been kind to those who simply shy away from polarizing opinions in defense of others. I'm sorry if you find the 'lifestyle' is being shoved down your throat, but ya know, you clicked the link? You commented twice? You're shoving it down yourself.

If it's not something you're interested in, just move along, mate. It probably won't go down as deep if you do that.

I like this conversation and I mentioned what I think people think not me. I'm fine with what you guys do, but not everyone agrees and I'm trying to figure out what is really behind this conversation.

[Hestzhyen]

I like this conversation and I mentioned what I think people think not me. I'm fine with what you guys do, but not everyone agrees and I'm trying to figure out what is really behind this conversation.

Everyone's got a strong opinion and Vanille opened Pandora's Box. That's what happened.

[Usho]

I'm fine with what you guys do, but not everyone agrees and I'm trying to figure out what is really behind this conversation.

Simple: 1.) A Troll enters the thread intent on derailing what was supposed to be a advertisement thread for a LGBT discord. (See Post #4 Page 1)
2.) Said person ruins what the thread initially was made for and in turn brings more people in thread who might have hidden bias against LGBT or are just trolls in general further derailing the topic.

This wasn't meant to blow up like this. This thread was made to let LGBT players and LGBT friendly players know that Gayorzea has a discord that players can join.

Protip: If you aren't interested in threads like this, and you aren't interested in joining the discord because #reasons...maybe don't post in a thread meant to invite people, and keep your reasons for not joining to yourself? Doing what Vanilla did will result in topic derailment.

[Dualgunner]

I mean, A) it takes two to tango. If literally nobody responded to Vanille, then her comment would have gotten swept up. However, you have to admit, through Vanille's back and forth with people supporting the LGBT server, you've kept the thread advertised and relevant--and isn't that a win?