Who are they, "in-game friends"?

[Kisagami]

I have a rough experience when it comes to friends online. Mainly because I am a very trusting person - I take people at face value and tend to give everyone a chance despite what others say. This has bitten me in the ass a lot - some of my real encounters with people from my online life seemed fine, even web cammed with a few and their friends, only to have information withheld because “well, I didn’t know he was luring you.” Like, you knew he was deceiving me... gave me comfort that the person was safe and legit. And then you’re surprised I’m hurt? I know the meaning of stranger danger. I’d rather not go into details.

Not all the people I met from games in the real world were bad - but I have psychological scars from some. Thus, I understand why people put a line between RL friends and in game friends. Some of the people I have met in game I adore and feel comfortable sharing RL details of my life. Maybe in a few years when I get to know them better we can set up a meet. But some friends stay online friends. They’re great for venting to, playing games together, talking on Discord - but I am very choosey with what details I choose to divulge about my RL. So there are in-game friends and friends.

That being said - some of my best friends are from online relationships. I consider them family. Like 6+ years of friendship. A year is not often enough to see through the virtual persona we portray online with the anonimity we have behind the screen.

Be careful of being decieved. Meeting someone who could very well be decieving and catfishing you can cause psycological harm and danger.

[Crysten]

The guy the OP mentioned sounds like a total asshole, to be honest.

I think I'm pretty unique in the sense that I've been hurt way more by people locally in my RL outside of games than I have with the friends I've made online. As such, I tend to be much more open to forging more personal relationships through the internet whereas outside of games I'm prone to keeping people at a distance.

I have known the people in my FC for nearly a decade after originally meeting in FFXI and doing Skype calls during Dynamis runs to make them less boring. Since then, we've developed a strong bond and make the effort to have mass FC outings to things like Distant Worlds and Fanfests as much as possible. At this stage, I consider this lot a second family.

Generally my criteria for friendship are those who actively make the effort to speak both in and out of the game, whether it's through Discord, WhatsApp, text or whatever.

My criteria for "co-workers" are members of your FC and friends lists who you speak to exclusively in-game.

Anyone else equates to people you added to FL but can never remember why.

[Laerune]

Friends are those that you like to spend time with it. One does not have think about it too much, if you like to spend time with someone (both online or offline), then you atleast consider them to be your friend. Some of my friends on the friendlist, do not interact with me (I have to take the first step), but other friends send me a personal message or greet me via Free Company/Linkshell the moment I log in.

Friends come in all shapes and sizes.

[Texa]

I had a in-game group that I was really close with. We'd stay up all night long on discord joking with each other about this or that and running things together. We didn't always agree with each other on everything, but I was never intentionally malicious to other people just occasionally petty. But then one night one of the dudes that I didn't know very well started demanding that I send him nudes. The others saw what was going on, but they were just like "lol there's a fight" like one dude trying to pressure a chick he barely know to send him nudes is some silly argument that's mutually ridiculous. Dude ended up harassing me for about 5 solid hours over that and when it hit me later that nobody there thought that was really messed up I just cut them all off.

A lot of the time you're never really going to know who actually is or isn't your friend until some kind of incident happens. MMOs tend to be full of fair weather friends and I really don't think there's any way to get around that.

[Ayer2015]

"I so don't care! We are friends in game only. I run content with him because he's a good tank but IRL? He can burn to crisps, I wouldn't care...")

Whoever this person is lacks any decency

[dinnertime]

Aside from appearances, I see no difference between people in-game and people in real life. Both can potentially be your good friends that you can trust, or people that are two-faced, lie and betray you.
People online have the advantage though since you cannot touch them so it's understandable and totally fine to have boundaries for people you meet in-game.

[Spirlia]

But then one night one of the dudes that I didn't know very well started demanding that I send him nudes. The others saw what was going on, but they were just like "lol there's a fight" like one dude trying to pressure a chick he barely know to send him nudes is some silly argument that's mutually ridiculous. Dude ended up harassing me for about 5 solid hours over that and when it hit me later that nobody there thought that was really messed up I just cut them all off.

I am SO sorry that happened to you. The fact that they didn't back you up is the worst.

As for me, Both irl and online I've never really had close friends. The kind of person someone mentioned earlier, that they could share 90% of everything with. For me, that's just my boyfriend and my family. Other than that there's only a few people in my fc and on nn that I chat with, the rest of my friends list are acquaintances or virtual strangers. The type that I might /wave to because I see their name is a difference color.

Then again, it's always been hard for me to make friends. Maybe I should get to know some of these people.

[Sakuraluna]

I always thought that it's quite obvious: friends are friends, same for everyone. Though one conversation I had about a year ago made me pay closer attention at whom actually different people would call "friends" or "in-game friends".

I hope that tank found someone else to run content with. That was pretty awful to say about someone who probably did see that person as a friend.