Well, there is nothing wrong with trying those dating websites. A girlfriend of mine did, and is married with a child. I found my husband though ... very odd circumstances (I was the type who thought I'd never get married, being almost everything you described yourself as).

My advice? Be yourself. Know what you want but also realize the 'perfect one' might not be who you really need. Go with your gut. If something doesn't feel right, don't be afraid to say no or look somewhere else (another girlfriend of mine didn't listen when I said the dude she was dating made my neck hair stand up .. and sure enough, that dude was abusive and controlling) and above all else, don't beat yourself up.

Good luck, and I hope you find someone.