Tips on being a mentor but not sounding bossy

[Darkobra]

NPC vendors are a thing.

Then give them money if you're that concerned. I'm not because it's a faceroll MMO.

Like I said, 4 downscaled 70s can do it. The casual community makes the most money so it makes business sense to make the game this easy for you.

[Mavrias]

Then give them money if you're that concerned. I'm not because it's a faceroll MMO.

Like I said, 4 downscaled 70s can do it. The casual community makes the most money so it makes business sense to make the game this easy for you.

Excusing players with bad gear at level 50 is how you end up with someone at i90 in the Vault or i200 in Bardam's Mettle, is my point. So your indignant defense of those people with level 20-30 accessories in a 50 dungeons makes little sense to me.

[bswpayton]

Excusing players with bad gear at level 50 is how you end up with someone at i90 in the Vault or i200 in Bardam's Mettle, is my point. So your indignant defense of those people with level 20-30 accessories in a 50 dungeons makes little sense to me.

your exactly right, at 50 you should have a basic understanding of gear, so if someones wearing a level 23 ring at level 50 whos to say they want go into dusk vigil wearing the job specific gear and that same level 23 ring. And dusk vigil hits hard I couldnt image a tank in job specific gear in dusk vigil.

[Raqrie_Tohka]

Ok just as a little case-study. All you wonderful people and conversation participants, experienced mentors and distinguished persons ... ahem, let me propose we play a little game to lighten things up and put it all into a bit of perspective.

Scenario: A paladin refuses to use shield oath in 4-man dungeon. The pal is using sword oath, though.

Question: What courses of action will you take to address this situation, as a mentor, and what is your reasoning behind taking these respective actions? What are some possible outcomes of the scenario, and what corresponding actions would you take to further address those?

[Raqrie_Tohka]

Sigh ... just try to focus on the case study, people. I'll post my own detailed analysis in a day or two.

[BlastHardcheese]

Biggest tip? Pick your battles, ask questions rather than pontificate, be polite and assume you're going to get the most negative response to your input.

If someone's rocking a level 3 ring at level 50 yet the rest of their gear is OK? This is not the hill you want to die on, they obviously understand gearing yet are either too lazy to gear that slot, in which case you'll probably get a negative response or no response. Or they forgot to equip something appropriate in which case you'll probably just embarrass then calling it out.

If you get a fabled ice/thunder BLM or someone that won't aoe the 50 mob's beating the tank to death then that's when you step in.

The last golden rule: If you start getting overwhelming negativity from trying to help, back down and leave them be or remove them if they're adversely effecting whatever it is you're trying to do at the time. Some people just cannot be reasoned with.

This is regarding leveling content and not anything endgame, if someone's in your Savage raid in vendor whites then I'd hope the whole group would back you up.

[zokque]

I have a relatively simple philosophy when it comes to mentoring.

-no need to say mechanics unless it's not blantantly obvious
-I only answer questions when asked
-don't comment on someone's gameplay unless it's really hindering the group.

I don't comment on healer/tank or even the dps' dps. As long as they're doing something and not sitting there I don't really care.

Does it frustrate me when the healer doesn't dps? Yes. Does it annoy me when the tank doesn't go out of tank stance to dps? Yes. Does it annoy me that the dps don't aoe? Yes. I always try to optimize myself in dps. I know what I'm doing is making the run go faster. If anyone asks, then yeah I'll tell them, because that most likely means that they do want to get better and won't get butthurt

I've just learned to not expect much from people.

[bswpayton]

I have a relatively simple philosophy when it comes to mentoring.

-no need to say mechanics unless it's not blantantly obvious


.

everything u said is fine but dps not aoeing this i believe wipes more runs than anything a healer does I just didnt notice how often dps literally do not aoe. at this point i feel like I might start kicking dps that dont aoe its that bad

[missybee]

I'm sure your mileage may vary, but I find that happy faces help to take the edge off...

Like, I am 0% happy that I am having to explain something super basic - but I don't want to convey my displeasure. I realize that some people are new, and that's okay too.

For instance, I recently got a Tam Tara with a sprout tank. He would just run into groups of mobs and face pull, and then proceed to kind of ignore all but the mob he was fighting. As you might imagine, this resulted in hate going crazy. I was dying internally, but I did my best to not be a colossal a-hole and said something along the lines of, "If you lead with a shield lob prior to running into the group of monsters and then use Flash, you might have an easier time holding hate "

So...I don't know. I guess you could also view that is me being super condescending, but that definitely isn't the intent. People like happy faces, right?

RIGHT?

[Jijifli]

Back before stormblood I'd get ninja's throwing a huge tantrum at me for asking them to not press their poison buff on and off, since it was a buff with no timer and the noise was somewhat distracting.

Honestly I don't wear my crown anymore. It just always feels like I'm either ignored or harassed over it. The few people that did listen were good, but it felt as though it was wasted effort.

If there's a way to make it more pleasing, I wish I knew how. It seems like I always come off like a rude person when I try to help...