Some of your questions and concerns have already been addressed, but ill go for a few answers too.
Race vs class/starting area/class lock: Makes very little difference. Once you complete the level 10 class quest(and i saw that you had) you open up the armory system. This lets you switch to any class in the game that you have unlocked just by equipping the proper tool/weapon. So your class becomes whatever you want after a short while. You can level up everything on one character, and are encouraged(but rarely required) to try new things. The difference in stats between the races is almost non-existent, and any race can play any class at a high level. You can also buy a potion on the mogstation to change your race, should you choose. As for the starting area, the main storyline has 3 different versions, based on which town you started in. However, around level 15 the quest from your hometown sends you to visit the other two towns, and at this point all 3 versions converge and its the same for everyone the rest of the way to 60. You eventually are asked to join one of the 3 grand companies, but you can pick one from whichever town you like(not stuck with where you started) and can even change this later on if you want. You can buy housing in any of the 3 cities(provided you meet the requirements and find an open plot). Really, city only affects your opening 15 levels of quests.
Crafting: Crafting is completely optional. The very best gear isnt crafted. And it can be a lot of work to get all the way into. With that said, id recommend trying it. You could level woodworker to 15 or so without even leaving the guild, and it would likely take you less then an hour to do. That would certainly give you a taste of it. Most people who get into it eventually level all 8 classes all the way. This is because the cross-class skills you get along the way make it MUCH easier to finish/hq the items you decide to make. A single class character can succeed in crafting, but its a lot more work. Also, many crafters pick up botany and mining(and maybe fishing) so they can get some of their own materials to save money. So with the costs covered, what are the benefits? Theres good gear you can make for yourself at all level ranges. None of it is the best, but you can make sure you always have something serviceable. This is especially helpful when leveling up a 2nd or 3rd(4th 5th whatever) class, as you can outfit yourself with decent stuff while working on getting good stuff. Alchemy and culinary disciplines also make things that are in short supply from quests/npcs. They can make potions and food to give you advantages. The medicines from alchemy arent amazing, and the potions have long enough cool-downs that you cant guzzle them to fight completely over your head, but they can help(and the stat enhancing potions are often staples of end-game raiding). Food boosts your stats a little, as well as your experience. You can buy cheap stuff in town, but you can make better stuff if you choose. Final point on crafting/gathering. The levels all line up fairly well. What i mean by that is that a level 20 crafter will mostly use level 20(and lower) gathered/killed for materials to make gear that is usable by a level 20 adventurer. So if you are up to date with these, youll be able to make items that are currently useful to you. That strong looking tree in the level 30 area might be harvested by a level 30 botanist and used by a level 30 carpenter to make you a new level 30 bow.
Leveling: Do the main story quests, do your class quests, do any unlock quests you see(those are the ones with the plus sign). When you get there, do the hall of the novice training in western la nosca. Already mentioned i know, but the bonus exp ring is nice and you can use it for every class you level. There are many additional ways to level, and you should try all of them to see what you enjoy. You can run dungeons, clear your hunting log(full of big one time bonuses for each adventuring class), run fates, do sidequests, complete entries in your challenge log(resets weekly so can be used multiple times), explore potd, and a few other options. The one that ill highlight though is your roulettes. Once you unlock your 2nd dungeon(happens around level 17) the duty finder will unlock your first roulette - leveling. It randomely puts you and a group of 3 others into a scenario from a list based on your level and what you have unlocked. The leveling roulette has all the 4 man dungeons from level 15-59 and all the 4 man trials from the same range. Once per day you get a big bonus for completing each roulette - for the leveling roulette the bonus is a ton of exp(usually close to a levels worth). Theres also a guildhest roulette you can unlock by doing the first few guildhests - same principal as leveling, but shorter instance and smaller exp bonus. You open up more roulettes at level 50 and 60.
Classes and jobs: Eventually you will want to graduate from your base class into a job. To do this you need to level your base class to 30 and complete all the class quests. You also need to level a side class to 15. For archer, this means leveling pugilist to 15 so that you can unlock bard. While playing as a bard your archer level continues to go up, you continue to have access to all your archer skills and you still use archer equipment, but you get extra bard skills you can use as well. For the most part, once you unlock a job theres no reason to go back and be a class again. You can customize your class/job a little with your choice of cross class skills. As a bard you can pick from a set of pugilist and lancer skills. With that said, for most classes its pretty obvious which skills are the most useful. Bard is still a DPS class, so youll probly pick the the skills that boost your damage(internal release, blood for blood) or improve your abilities(invigorate - gives you back some tp). Therefore, to get your stealthy type and your tanky type you like youll likely end up leveling up extra classes and jobs at some point. Ninja is a stealthy one, paladin is very tanky. As mentioned, you can be everything so you are encouraged to try these out.
Player experience: One of the reasons this game feels more "solo'ish" is that there arent any public chat channels like there are in other games. Oh sure, you can shout at the guy across the bazaar, but the person on the other side of town doesnt hear it. This feeling will change a bit if you get into some more channels(also, some cities/hubs are just busier feeling then others). Youre still low level, so i would recommend the novice network. Any mentor can invite you. You could join also join an FC. Either of those options also potentially provide in-game help and answers to your questions. The game also uses Linkshells as a means of communicating. These are private chat channels that can be devoted to anything or nothing. You might join one only for crafters, one devoted to lala worship, or just one where people can chat while they play. I see that youre on my server, and im in one of the chatty ones. Shoot me a tell in game, and ill send you an invite if you want.
Endgame: So currently the cap is 60. Endgame content is therefore level 60 dungeons(sorta), and level 60 raids. There are 12 group raids(each has a normal and a "savage" difficulty) and 3 alliance raids(these are 24 man instances). The most up to date gear comes from the most recent 4 group raids(hard versions) and the most recent alliance one. Dungeon gear isnt as good as raid gear, and the dungeons are all fairly easy to beat. However, all level 60 content rewards currency(tomestones - as does level 50 but with a different version) that can be used to buy very good stuff(the best available will be a combination of raided and bought for many classes). The most recent patch also re-introduced the diadem, a level 60 multi-group instance where you explore and fight tough monsters for rewards that are sometimes great(and other times not so much). PotD isnt strictly end game content(you can unlock it at level 18), but the deepest floors are plenty tough.
Forums: Sorry for your difficulty. Already mentioned, but ill restate. If you edit your post, you can exceed the character limit. For instance, this post is 8610 characters long. I typed the whole thing out, cut out most of it, then opened edit and pasted back what i removed. Its annoying, but its a work-around that actually works.
Come back with any further questions, continue enjoying the game, and happy hunting!