Mechanic- "Your car is a broken piece of shit sir. Driving it in this condition may harm what you think about both yourself, and the car manufacturer. How have you been driving this in this condition for so long?"
Owner- " WHat are you talking about!? They make the best cars around! What do you suggest I do?"
Mechanic - "Well normally I would say get a rental and leave it here with me until we can fix it, but because you seem to think so highly of the manufacturer, I am gonna make an exception. We will continue to service your car a few times a year in hopes of bringing it up to speed so to speak, but we are gonna have to charge you a monthly fee for as long as it takes us to do that."
Owner- "Can you guarantee my satisfaction with the final product that justifies this ridiculous fee?"
Mechanic- "Not only can we not do thatbut, for the first month before we start charging we are gonna paint half the car lime green and cut your front breaks. We'll paint the other half and fix you breaks after you start paying us."
Owner- "Ok, sign me up, but only because I am the dumbest fucking person on the planet."