Reading over these, I can understand everyone's POV on why it might bother them. It's not something I personally care about. If my dps pulls ahead of me, chances are they are going to bring it to me(which they usually do 9/10). If they don't I grab it if I can though the only ones that do that are DRGs and NINs that I've seen and they can handle a mob solo easily. I've never met an elitist and if I was partied with them, they knew what they were doing so there was never an issue. Honestly, respect towards your fellow man/woman goes a long way. I know, super edgy and outside the meta but that's been my experience thus far. I'm nice to them, they're nice to me, our time does awesome, we get phat lewts, everyone wins.
TL;DR Kindness and Respect gets shit done and done right.