Cloud trying to find out who he really is in the life stream and Aerith dying is two instances and is not "alot" and I think you really misinterpreted Cloud's intentions with Tifa because he did not hate her at all, I know VII's localization was bad but unless you're just mashing the circle button it's really not that hard to read between the lines.
Cloud's a goofy, sarcastic and snarky character, always has been, Kingdom Hearts and Advent Children really did not do him justice and this how people always see him now.

One instance of him being himself
Yuffie during the date scene after she kisses him on the cheek
"well Cloud say something"

"...something"
Not really something an emo would say, I guess that makes Noctis from XV emo too.