Would you like an in-game parser?

[Sebazy]

...that has been proven over time immemorial to be ripe for misuse and abuse

There's far more evidence to show that SE's existing ToS makes griefing people over their DPS just about the second fastest way to get banned, only coming in behind hurling slurs in /shout.

However, a full bore ACT clone in game isn't the answer anyway as I genuinely don't think it would gain much traction outside of the console crowd.

Personally I'd much rather see a simple system that notes your average potency per second across the instance, compares it to a historic trend of others running the same instance on the same job and then generates an S to F style ranked score from that. Nothing specific, nothing numeric and shown to that player only.

It achieves a few key things without room for negativity or fear mongering, the key being that it dangles a carrot nudging people to try a bit harder, play a little better, something the game currently fails to do. It's ignorable and the point isn't to gate anything behind it. Plenty of people see a score and get the instinct to try and improve it and this is aimed squarely at them, plenty of people likely don't even realise they are playing awfully because the game won't tell them and other players aren't allowed to, again, this is aimed at improving that situation.

More people trying that little bit harder or even just realising that they could potentially be playing better would make the overall DF experience a better one IMO.