Would you like an in-game parser?

[Reynhart]

Yes, still... people think just because I could run a parser I'm automatic an asshole.

Of course not.

Let's say you're not an asshole. Since you obviously want a parser, let's assume you use one. You see some DPS lacking, but you don't call them out, or if you do, you do that politely. If they give you a parser, it won't change anything for you or for those parsed by you.

Now, let's say you're an asshole (Which you're not, because if you were, we'd probably stopped this discussion a long time ago). You're still under the assumption of using an unofficial parser and you see some DPS lacking. You still don't call them out, because parsing is not officially permitted and you don't want to risk being reported. If they give you a parser, suddenly, you're allowed to express all your asshole-ry on those DPS. That's a change, but not a very nice one, in my opinion