Would you like an in-game parser?

[Reinha]

However, within the top-tier content, parsing data can be a holy grail of information for raid teams and even PUG groups trying to participate in this content.
. . .
However, by limiting the content a parser is available in to these types of fights, the casual crowd, who typically do not even attempt to undertake these kinds of fights, would remain free of having jackasses constantly berate them because they may not be doing the best DPS humanly possible in Antitower Roulette.

I would be ok with this suggestion. Or just a personal parser everywhere. Surely tight-knit savage teams trust each other enough to not lie about their numbers? Either way, I don't really care what goes on in the end-game circles as long as it doesn't drip down to casual content. "Git gud or be called out (and you have only yourself to blame for being picked on)" as Seraphix so eloquently put it, is exactly the type of attitude I don't want to see imposed on anyone during my time in-game, and I'll happily avoid harder content to save myself from that cringe fest.

By the way I liked your post, because you are one of the few people to take into account the concerns of both sides without dismissing them as irrelevant or deflecting an issue by bringing up another. A lot of the time people talk past each other when discussing parsers. Pro-parser people are worried about not clearing (in hard content), and anti-parser people are worried about increasing hostility or a more competitive atmosphere (in casual content). Understanding the environments where those concerns rise from is important when trying to find a solution that suits everyone. Seems we have reached a good compromise. Now I'm curious to see if my other prediction comes true.

[Dement]

Or just a personal parser everywhere. Surely tight-knit savage teams trust each other enough to not lie about their numbers?

While yes, tight-knit savage teams may not lie to each other or care, the problem with this arises from often times when a member of a static is missing you have to PUG from the general population or, alternatively, try the fights with a complete PF made party (especially happens in Extreme primals). You may get someone who knows what they're doing or you may get someone who is completely new and just wants to give it a try. One of the long time points of the pro-parser crowd is that if you build a PUG party that can't clear a DPS check, you don't have any official way of knowing who isn't pulling their weight. While I'm all for being inclusive, if someone is not capable enough at their job to meet an average DPS necessity of high-end content then they don't really have a place there until they can improve to a point of meeting said check.

Now the typical counter-argument for this is "well what's average or what is the standard" but I feel that argument is assuming that people doing high end raids have never seen other people play or never pay attention to what others are getting. If a parser was available for high end content and I join a PUG and see a MCH doing 2000 DPS, I'm not automatically going to assume that 2000 DPS is the standard for MCH in that fight. If my next party the MCH is doing 800 DPS, I will reasonably assume that one of them was incredibly skilled and doing very high DPS and the other is doing very low DPS with the average right around 1300. After 5 or 10 runs in which I have a MCH in my group, I will have a general idea of how much a MCH is able to do and be able to judge accordingly if someone isn't quite up to snuff from there on out. This would only be further aided by everyone having the parsing data and therefore being to ask your FC members or LSes what their average MCH has historically gotten if you feel the one in your group is not contributing to a DPS check.

Again I'm not advocating that person be disbarred from the fight forever; however, it's usually pretty clear that the party isn't going to pass a DPS check with a person who is consistently far below average. This would be a good time to remove said person which admittedly may be an ugly affair but the removed person would have empirical evidence that they need to practice their rotation and, whether it was stated nicely or meanly, they would at least walk out with knowledge of what their class should be doing DPS wise. Then they could turn to training dummies which would also be able to tell them their DPS and work on rotations until they are doing better and can try joining a group again. The glory of this is that once you have this information and know your rotation, you'll learn your proper rotation and shouldn't ever be kicked from a party again.... unless you can't get mechanics but that's far outside the parser debate.