Yay! Making friends!

[Gemina]

Snip...

Aww! What a sad post

I'm such a butterfly, fluttering all over Eorzea. I station myself in Gridania, but I am never there very long. At least, not until I start gathering and crafting. I'm swimming in old content though, so spending 2-3k on ports in a night is pretty common, but I also love to spend time in zones I find very beautiful and relaxing. I MUST get away from grinds so I don't burn myself out. But you've been playing longer, have seen much more, and nostalgia has already set in for you. I completely understand how you feel.

I wish I would see more neighbors just talking to each other. I'd wager that preformed parties would increase, while DF will still be used to keep skills sharp. Maybe try leaving your house. Say like maybe a week? Grab a couple of green leafs and coach them up? I dunno. Just tossing suggestions

[Mikita]

I wish I would see more neighbors just talking to each other.

When hanging around town, sometimes my friends and I just talk in /say instead of LS chat. It actually opens the door to meeting new people every once in a while. ^^

Sadly this is what I do on my server because I barely speak Japanese, although most people there really friendly like instead emote on me because maybe I'm roegadyn lol. I always hangout with neigbor and some linkshell friend.

You might try talking in /say in English with your friends from time to time. Who knows? There may be more English speakers that you are not aware of, or you could also find Japanese people who speak English.

It happened to me in reverse recently. I was in Idyllshire and overheard some people talking in English so I went over to say hello. I didn't know there were any English speakers left on our server, so it was a bit of a surprise.

The world is too quite because most people just stick to LS or FC chat. So sometimes it helps to break the silence a bit. ^^

[tinythinker]

I suspect there are many people who would love to be more friendly and social but are worried about snobs and trolls ignoring them, mocking them, or otherwise being rude. You don't always know if someone is trying to be nice or just annoying if they start following you around /emoting over and over.

But that said, there are probably more people playing who genuinely want to be kind than hurtful and if you guess wrong there is always blacklisting (or if necessary reporting). I'm only a few weeks in but I've met some helpful folks and try to help others when I'm running around. Healed some people doing a fate yesterday (non-grouped) and I didn't notice one had run off to the side and died. They whispered me for a rez, and after looking around I found them and got an achievement for getting them up. If there aren't more of those types of achievements maybe adding a few might help. It was nice to see a little message pop up from the game promoting friendly behavior.

(Oh and congrats OP!)

[Ebonwings]

Congrats OP. It's nice to hear that you made friends and that's a beautiful story. We all are friends here in a way because of those grinds.
While my story of making friends are from either my famous disconnecting from server >.> or running into a person a lot ( you name it: DF, PF , cities/ towns, or DF for raids). Eventhough we are not on each other friend list ( to the point we are both thinking the other is stalking ), we are already friends. XD

[FunkYeahDragons]

Good on you. ;o

Making friends is one of the hardest parts of the game, actually. A year into playing and I still haven’t found a permanent FC (they all died or are so cliquey people literally won't respond to new members speaking), but I’ve made great friends through my Linkshells and our PVP grind. I couldn't find a Linkshell so I just started inviting other players on my server I saw in Feast and putting out the occasional ad. I'll probably do the same when Deep Dungeon comes out.

[Lenne]

I'm happy to hear about your positive experience, Gemina. It surprises me, when browsing the forums, how many people are like me. While I have a very difficult time making friends, it's nice to see others succeed, especially when you can understand it can be downright painful to reach out to someone. Kudos to you for not only reaching out, but for extending yourself to do a kind gesture for someone you didn't know. Here's to more friendships, friendly encounters, and friendly behavior in general.

[WinterLuna]

Aw I really like this thread, I'm happy for you and thank you for sharing

[Gemina]

Thanks for the responses. I'm glad I could bring some good vibes to the forum. Thinking about it now, I don't even know how I reached out like that. Sooo not me!

I know there's some bad apples out there. They're the reason why I have grown so cynical of the general population. I'm no stranger to trolls and internet harassment either. But my experience has shown that because I've been so negative, so cynical, and put so much energy to fighting those d-wads, it really closes the window on the good people out there. They will pass you right by just like this person would have had I not said anything.

Because of my social anxiety, it's difficult to log into the game. I am fine once I am in. Until I have to group lol... But I am fine again after a few minutes. I guess I just try my best to face the fear right in its face, only to find out that there was never much to fear at all. In fact, I find smiles instead. I encourage others to add smiles to their daily grinds as well!

[Alexftw]

Well then theres people like me who will never have many long term friends no matter what due to their terrible personality(way too much researching, talking and self centered). People tell me all the time I look like I'm looking down on them when in truth I either I'm just commenting my opnion or helping them xD (tbh I even help new players over extreme trials all the time). Then again I've gotten used to it and I don't care much since I don't care about making friends these days ^^. I help people because I enjoy seeing their sastifaction and also because it's a challenge, and sometimes you meet potential players to play with in future. No other reason.

[Gemina]

Totally agree Mikita. That's what /say is for. Hell, it's the default setting! It allows others to contribute to the conversation, but everyone sticks to FC/LS chat. If players spoke in /say chances are very high that someone nearby will know what they are talking about and join in. /shout chat happens on occasion, but is typically short lived. I also find /shout akin to FC/LS chat. It's a little more RP and personal interacting with another player up close and w/ emotes, and I guess a lot of players really can't be bothered with all that. It's a bummer for those who would love to incorporate that kind of play.

Those of us who have interacted with other players in such a way, can you ever say it was boring or felt like a grind? I'd wager if anything, it made the time go by ridiculously fast. You also find the experience far more rewarding than the item your grinding things out for in the first place, and walk away with a smile regardless if you get it or not.