Enmity is a different beast in FFXIV. I came from WoW where they handed it out like candy at Halloween, and it was a bit of a culture shock. It takes more work and focus to maintain, and personally, I find that sort of gameplay to be much more compelling than any contrived attempt at basing mitigation on rotational performance.
Flash your targets often. You can technically chain it 7-8 times before you run out of mana. And if you see a target's HP bar starting to go down more quickly than your own in the target list, click to it and hit it with a RoH combo, because that means someone's burning it.
The other thing you can do is mark your kill order, so the DPSwillshould know which target to attack (I've given up trying to teach Dragoons to count). It can slow down a dungeon, though, so I have a set of macros I use:
Marking 2 Targets, starting with <t>!
/mk attack1 <t>
/ac "Target Forward"
/mk attack2 <t>
/target <attack1>Marking 3 Targets, starting with <t>!
/mk attack1 <t>
/ac "Target Forward"
/mk attack2 <t>
/ac "Target Forward"
/mk attack3 <t>
/target <attack1>Marking 4 Targets, starting with <t>!
/mk attack1 <t>
/ac "Target Forward"
/mk attack2 <t>
/ac "Target Forward"
/mk attack3 <t>
/ac "Target Forward"
/mk attack4 <t>
/target <attack1>Because of how quickly these run, I've been able to use them in Ex Roulette without too much difficulty. People don't always follow the markers, but I've found that ~80% of the time, it can make pulls go a lot easier.Marking 5 Targets, starting with <t>!
/mk attack1 <t>
/ac "Target Forward"
/mk attack2 <t>
/ac "Target Forward"
/mk attack3 <t>
/ac "Target Forward"
/mk attack4 <t>
/ac "Target Forward"
/mk attack5 <t>
/target <attack1>
Granted, if you're doing big pulls with an AoE heavy group (some combination of BLM, SMN, and MNK), marking won't matter anyway and you should just spam Flash (and pray), but old habits die hard.
EDIT: Also, putting your bonus stat points into Strength will help (until we get to 3.2). I've taken to doing it on all of my tanks, simply because it makes life just a little bit easier in leveling content.