KABOOM! Baseless Head-Canons [SPOILERS]

[Mykaelus]

I thought it might be fun if we could all share little head-canons we have for our favorite Eorzeans. Things that are not supported by the game, but they could be true... and it's fun to pretend they are!

Here are a few of mine.

Papashan bribed a young Nanamo with cookies to behave.

The first time Raubahn lifted Nanamo onto his shoulder after losing his arm, he lost his balance and almost dropped her. A Flames private later found him practicing lifting with a sack of flour.

Everybody in the Maelstrom wants Merlwyb and Eynzahr to be a couple, but they are really just best friends. They laugh about the rumors together.

Merlwyb is really good with children.

Kan-E had a lisp when she was younger and was embarrassed by it. That’s why she speaks so precisely and distinctly now.

Wedge has a drawer full of random items he’s gotten for Tataru as presents, but he chickens out giving them to her.

Y’Shtola prefers women.

[Aillith]

Hahaha, that last one.

The only one I have ever really thought about is that the warrior of light suffers from PTSD.
This is the only way I can explain why one moment I am sitting on my chocobo riding through the highlands and then BAM, I'm reliving the Ifrit easy battle, only to find on completion I am still on my now very confused chocobo in the middle of the road wondering why we stopped? Kewh? You don't fight gods without having some sort of adverse reaction - PTSD I tell ya.

[Cilia]

The only one I have ever really thought about is that the warrior of light suffers from PTSD.

This actually has a little canon confirmation, y'know...

Really think about Fray's behavior during the DRK 30-50 quest...

The Warrior of Light has been through trauma after trauma, even discounting their hobby of deicide. It's understandable.

[CyrilLucifer]

Yeah, I'd consider the WoL having some PTSD basically canon at this point for the reason Cilia pointed out. Some of the lines really cement it, like never leaving a weapon aside again.

My own baseless headcanon is that Lahabrea and Igeyorhm were in some sort of twisted intimate relationship.

[Morningstar1337]

The True Brothers of the Faith (AKA, 3.1's antagonists) are on the verge of summoning a primal (3 guesses who), spurned by Thordan's success at doing the same thing

Phoenix Downs are actually a manifestation of Louisoix's aether after his own summoning and subsequent battle with Bahamut, which is also why they are so rare

Soon, the fact that payers can become a Black Mage and a White Mage, or a Paladin and a Dark Knight, or other jobs aspected to opposing elements in the light/dark axis will become a plot point

There's an alternate universe version of Eorzea, only crystalized to the point where even the people are nothing more like then living immobile crystal statues (Think something like the Fayth or l'Cie who completed their focus). This is one where the Light threw the darkness out of the equation and messed up the balance (and a certain quintet of ebon clad god-slayers hail from this universe)

Each of the Jobs has a certain common color type, and gemstones of that color help enhance that job's capabilities, this is independent of the Soulstones as one colored gemstone can enhance multiple jobs, the colors are Red, Yellow, Green, Blue, Purple and White.

Ever since the fall, Dalamud is always in Malefic, and the lore of Astromancy vaguely predicted that it's point will be fixed

Summoners at 60 can use more then just Painflare and Deathflare, they can also access the ability Ank Morn, and even Teraflare, however it will take a large group of summoners for that to work and very few even know they can do it (Plus Ank Morn is too weak for the amount of effort involved, unless you're Bahamut)

The Grand Companies continue the PvP charade because they know that the Asicans and Garlemald might also be interested in Omega, and that while Teledgi might be neutralized the same cannot be said of Lolorito.

Yda and Papalymo have a brother/sister dynamic

Cuchulainn, Belias and the other XII Espers are Voidsent in XIV's universe were experiemtned on by Allag to see if they can merge demon and eikon, Belias is the only known sucess story and later became the inspiration for the Amalj'aa's myths.

the Gnath and Vanu Vanu were allagin experiemnts like the Ixal and the Phantom Ray at the Fractal Continunm was menat to oversee the Gnath, eventually becoming worshiped as Ravana

[Mykaelus]

Hahaha, that last one.

I don't know why I got that vibe from her, I just did! Though I imagine given the structure of Miqo'te society, it probably is common.

[Mykaelus]

My own baseless headcanon is that Lahabrea and Igeyorhm were in some sort of twisted intimate relationship.

I guess they did sort of merge into a single unholy abomination, which is kind of like a marriage.

[Twailaith]

The barkeepers of Limsa, Ul'dah and Gridania may or may not be part of a secret society that guides all adventurers, - including the Scions, from all over Eorzea from behind the scenes. The Ascians suspect their existence, and blame them whenever a plan goes awry.

Tataru once had a sorta crush on Papalymo, which he didn't really know what to do about, something that Yda teases him about constantly.

^ Because he doesn't know it has ended, he's always awkward around her, something Tataru enjoys reinforcing as she considers it a fair punishment for not giving her a chance.

^^ Seeing the above and not knowing the context makes Wedge a very sad lala.

Haurchefant had a crush on the WoL (semi-confirmed?)

When Shtola was brought back, Kan-E Senna totally checked her out... Cat ears are a thing for her.

When Shtola was brought back, Alphinaud tried to check her out. (3.1 : Called it, hah!) Tataru later on chewed him out on it. Cat ears have now become a thing for him as well.

...Tataru waited with checking her out until they got her to the room. She found that the measurements she'd taken were correct. And the ears were indeed soft and fuzzy.

The Warrior of Light, no matter what gender or race, will never try to check out an unconscious Y'Shtola, because he/she has heroic willpower/is a bro like that.

The derplander however, would still be drooling.


And finally the big reveal:

Pipin is in fact the illicit lovechild between Raubahn and Nanamo (magic was involved) who's traveled back in time (again, magic) in order to save his once and future kingdom from a as-of-yet unnamed threat.

...Because the first time Pipin showed up and introduced himself as Raubahn's son, my head went places...

[Mykaelus]

Phoenix Downs are actually a manifestation of Louisoix's aether after his own summoning and subsequent battle with Bahamut, which is also why they are so rare

Holy Old Man Dandruff. I am never using Phoenix Downs again.

There's an alternate universe version fo Eorzea...

Given how many alternate Vana'diels there are, I'd be surprised if this wasn't the case! ...now I kinda want Dynamis Ishgard and Abyssea Mor Dhona...

the Gnath and Vanu Vanu were allagin experiemnts like the Ixal and the Phantom Ray at the Fractal Continunm was menat to oversee the Gnath, eventually becoming worshiped as Ravana

I like this one! I did wonder about the similarity between Ray and Ravana. I also thought the ability of Vanu Vanu to animate inanimate objects was unusual, but this could be the basis of it!

[KeluBehemoth]

Speaking of this. Hasn't it been hinted that yshtola is gay? Do we not have any gay NPC? I swear I've seen one some where.