[Silly] Horrible Tank Changes

[Donjo]

I'm feeling silly, so I thought of an idea. 3.2 has a chance to change the way Tanks work in some manner. People are running about trying to figure out the most plausible way to do this while keeping the meta largely where it is.

I'd like to go the opposite direction. What could SE change to royally piss off the Tank community? Be as evil as possible!

I shall begin.

All

- Job Lock Accessories. Do not change the properties of stats in any way.
- Fending Accessories are restricted from receiving Strength Materia.
- Enmity Combo multipliers reduced to 1.0x -> 3.0x -> 5.0x across the board. Any Tank Stances with multipliers above 2.0x are reduced to 2.0x.
- Positive Enmity Multipliers are disabled when outside of a Tank Stance. This applies as a trait gained at the same time as the Tank Stance. All attacks from outside a Tank Stance will instead produce enmity at a 0.5x multiplier.
- Leaving a Tank Stance reduces enmity in nearby enemies by half.

Warrior

- Switch the potencies of Storm's Path and Butcher's Block.
- Wrath/Abandon abilities cost 30 TP in Defiance and 60 TP in Deliverance.
- Wrath/Abandon abilities break combos.
- Wrath/Abandon is no longer swapped when switching stances.
- The Cooldown of Equilibrium is increased to 90 seconds.

Dark Knight

- The Cooldown for Dark Mind is increased to 120 seconds.
- Delirium's Intelligence Down debuff is moved to Power Slash.
- Plunge can only be used if the user is between 10 and 15 yalms away from the target.

Paladin

- Instead of adding extra auto-attacks, Sword Oath now increases attack speed by 5%.
- Royal Authority now costs 1414 MP to execute.
- Clemency's potency is now calculated from the Healing Magic Potency Stat.

[Kumori_Kumo]

-Paladin Relic is now an actual whiffle ball bat
-Dark Knight Limit Break level 3 is a Samba De Amigo stage
-Warrior does emotional damage only

[Einheri]

So you hid a nerf war/drk thread behind an Oh I'm just being silly facade?

[Kumori_Kumo]

So you hid a nerf war/drk thread behind an Oh I'm just being silly facade?

Ooh, somebody's been stacking the Cynicism stat! That one's great for massive AOE emnity.

[Jpec07]

I'll play this game.

All:
- All "Fending" and Esoteric gear for tank jobs now only has Vit and Parry (you need to meld for accuracy).
- Encounters now have high-frequency, high-potency white damage, as well as regular aggro table resets, forcing tanks to build for survival and play for enmity.
- Tank DPS is now a direct function of group DPS, where a tank will never be able to output more than 5% of a group's total damage.
- Except Paladins, who are buffed to 30% of the group's total damage.
- Strength on gear now reduces the effectiveness of your cooldown abilities.
- Crit on gear now also increases the likelihood that you will take critical damage.
- Tanks generate negative enmity and take double damage in their DPS stances.
- Stances cannot be activated while in combat.
- Parry now only reduces damage by 10%, instead of 20%.
- Provoke is now a Gladiator-exclusive skill, so not even PLD can use it.

WAR:
- Deliverance removed. Warriors will now be switched to DRG when they attempt to activate the stance.
- Fel Cleave potency reduced to 2.
- Holmgang now roots your entire party in place with a new trait, "all for one," which also echoes damage received by the tank to all party members.
- Stacks gained from abilities now increase Piety instead of Parry
- Using Inner Beast causes a berserker state where you will only autoattack random targets for the next five minutes, and may cause you to dryhump their leg (even if you've been neutered)
- All Warriors will now be turned into a male Hyur Midlander with the default appearance on equipping the Soulstone.

DRK:
- Darkside visual affect adjusted to be bigger, brighter, and more annoying (so everyone will know when there's a DRK in the group).
- Blood Price no longer usable while Grit is active
- All cooldown abilities locked to Grit. You cannot use your cooldowns without Grit
- Grit cannot be dropped or activated during combat.
- Darkside now has a 15-second cast time
- DA+C&S Effect: no more potency boost. Doubles MP restoration.
- Any ability that costs MP now has a cast time proportionally long to its MP cost.
- There are no changes to the job of you are a Xaela Auri male named Sidurgu, or some variation of "Batman."

PLD:
- Paladins no longer use shields. Must equip 1H swords in both slots. Abilities still rely on block.
- Enmity coefficients reduced to 1x damage done.
- Shield Oath now increases your block rate by 20% natively and allows you to block magic--but also requires a shield.
- Sword Oath autoattack potency reduced to 10.
- Circle of Scorn cooldown increased to 600 seconds. Potency cut in half.
- Flash no longer generates enmity.
- Divine Veil triggers three ready checks for all raid members, one at a time, to be used. All ready checks must be passed before the buff is placed on the PLD, and it will only shield anyone within 5 yalms for 1% of PLD HP.
- Clemency removed (because no one was using it anyway).
- Paladin abilities no longer interrupt enemy attacks.
- Sword Oath now switches your Parry and Mind stats, with the expectation that you will off-heal.
- Spirits Within is now on the global cooldown and resets your combo.

[SpookyGhost]

- Switch the potencies of Storm's Path and Butcher's Block.
- Wrath/Abandon abilities cost 30 TP in Defiance and 60 TP in Deliverance.
- Wrath/Abandon abilities break combos.
- Wrath/Abandon is no longer swapped when switching stances.
- The Cooldown of Equilibrium is increased to 90 seconds.

triggered.jpg

Though, tbh, wouldn't mind Equilibrium @ 90s or BB <-> SP.

[Twilite]

All they have to do is remove Butcher's Block and WAR is finished.

[Bashum]

I envision something like this for warriors:

http://www.gucomics.com/20000828

[Sapphidia]

Shield/Sword Oath, Deliverance/Defiance and Grit/Nogrit now function like Astrologian Sects and cannot be swapped in combat.

Sword Oath, Deliverance and Darkside now come with a -90% enmity modifier to all damage done.

[Kabooa]

In order to better accommodate those tired of the trinity system, we are removing the Tank class from the game. All remaining classes have had their hit points and durability increased to compensate, and will now have to juggle threat to clear content.

In a future patch, we will also phase out healers.