Details:
The game crashes immediately after I hit "play" on the loader and it boots up.

Steps:
Always does it, no matter what I do. I set all the graphics down, tried running in administrator mode, changed the font settings, upgraded my drivers, downgraded my drivers, reinstalled FF, and ran it in compatibility mode. Every single time I tried to run it, crash. "FFXIV has stopped working." HALP PLOX!

Date & Time:
Always.

Frequency:

Under certain conditions: Whenever my hopes get raised.


Platform:
Windows PC.

PC Manufacturer & Model Number:

Acer Aspire 5740-6378, designation: "The Alabama Night Train"

Operating System:
"Blessed" with windows 7 home premium.

Graphics Card:
Intel Graphics Media Accelerator HD. Pretty sure it's made of cardboard and children's wishes.

ISP:
Charter. From the moon!

Type of Internet Connection:
Cable, but powered by a series of moogles on circular treadmills. I cut their pom-poms off if they're not fast enough.

Anyway, I've tried pretty much everything I can think of to fix it, but thinking isn't my strong suit, so I figured I'd let you guys take a whack at it. Best of luck!