Okay, you're basing your sources for talking about job balance on the forum on expert dungeon experiences. Know that DF people and people that are not invested into hardcore content in general are very rarely pushing their job to the maximum. You may be thinking that you're playing SMN perfectly, but at i197, if you're only doing 1050 DPS at maximum, you're really lacking something. Same goes for that DRG just going above 1150. DRG just wrecks shit, in a 1min30 dummy fight like Curator, my statics DRG is still above 1600.
And for the WAR, I play WAR at 60 and almost always run my expert dungeons with it, I pull shitton of mobs and have no problems holding agro with my statics BLM doing full banana sandwich DPS, above 3000 burst AoE DPS while myself doing above 2300 in Deliverance and the healer Holybombing.
You're just not playing your job at maximum, even if you think so, and that's not a problem since you're not TERRIBAD either (I've seriously seen some DPS doing below 600 single target on bosses in experts), and you seem to be still enjoying the game (and that's what playing a game is all about). But when it comes to arguing over job balance, you can't just speak without complete knowledge of what jobs can do when played at 100% of their capacities.
Edit :
High tank damage are required in order to kill end-game raid bosses. A tank also gains more personnal benefits from increasing his STR than his VIT. VIT is only useful if you absolutely need more HP in order to survive a single attack that would one shot you otherwise (tankbusters). STR gives you more damage, and by so, gives you more healing via lifestealing abilities (Inner Beast, Bloodbath, lolStorm's Path, Souleater), and also increases the effectiveness of every self-healing moves tanks have access to (Equilibrium, Second Wind, lolClemency). It means that you gain an indirect form of sustained mitigation from STR while gaining absolutely no mitigation from VIT. You're also killing the boss faster, thus making the fight easier on the healer with more efficiency than having more HP for them to heal. That's why when gearing a tank, we do : HP till we have enough to survive -> the rest goes in STR. And currently, the HP needed to survive the most hard hitting encounters are so low that we can tank them with full STR gear.