Retainer Ad-Venture Contest (EU) - Entry Thread

[KayailSong]

When I applied to be a retainer, I knew I was getting into tough work. Adventurers sending me off without so much as a word of praise. My current employer is just as you'd expect, she just hands me stuff and tell me what to do with it. Can't say I blame Kaya'il, her tales are often regaled to me at the tavern, and it certainly seems like my work pales in comparison.

Sorry what was that? You wanted to hear about my work? Of course you wouldn't want to hear about me, my mistake.
*Muttering* No bloody recognition around here *Muttering*.

Currently my employer has me running off looking for nothing in particular, just telling me to "bring back what I can find". You should see the look on her face when I bring back a fully-intact cottage roof. No of course I didn't steal it from her neighbours! Though that would certainly be an easier solution... Anyroad, how do I find a cottage roof you ask? I just wander around places that adventurers frequently frequent, as they seem to love discarding bits and bobs that they don't want. Occasionally I find a roof, and I take it.

Oh, sorry, must run, she's calling me again; can't disappoint the Warrior of Light now can I? *Sigh* The things I do for coin...

[KayailSong]

Woops, forgot to write details.

Character name: Kaya'il Song
World name: Shiva
Prize: Bluebird Earrings

[TomoGlaciertear]

Character Name: Tomo Glaciertear
World Name: Excalibur, Primal
Choice: Bluebird Earring

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One day, I sent Kounosuke out on a venture. He decided, with his spear in hand, that he wasn't going to let me down cause ya know, I was about to fire him for all the fish and stolen furniture he brought me. One hour later, I go to see what he brings me for his venture...and he hands me, I kid you not, a White Raven Fragment. He just stood there...smiling...tail wagging in hopes of the good job he did. I want to ask how he obtained this but I fear for my life now. Help.

[Pichu737]

Character Name: U'holha Na'lon
World Name: Shiva
Prize: Scarf of Wondrous Wit



"Wait, you wanted fish?" A blood coated retainer shouted at his master, who was talking to his Free Company leader. The dragoon turned around and sighed as the leader walked into the distance and teleported away. "Yes! Not a pile of bodies! Ezral, I have a question." The dragoon said to his retainer. "Yes, sir? Ask away." Ezral replied. "How did you get through education? Did you even have education?" the dragoon asked. "Well, Master Na'lon, I worked hard and got.... nothing." The retainer's voice fell. "I never did have a proper education" Master Na'lon looked at him, with a look of sadness. "I have a piece of kelp though!" The retainer was over enthusiastically recovering. "Damn it, Ezral!" Na'lon shouted aggressively. "Time to go home, I suppose..."

The Free Company house was small, just big enough for about 20 members. Ezral was sitting at the desk as Master Na'lon walked in. "How are things with the company?" Na'lon asked. "Quite well, Sir U'holha. How goes the dragoon training?" U'holha Na'lon hadn't felt right since the Fantasia he drunk. The slow transformation into an Elezen almost broke him, and slowed his training significantly. "My training is slow but fine. How are your parents?" U'holha asked. The answer that came next was enough to send the poor dragoon flying. "Horrible, sir. Haven't heard anything from my father. But I found this outside!" Ezral handed his master a small bag. He opened it up and a small orange ball rolled out. And inflated. And exploded. U'holha Na'lon, the dignified Mi'qote turned Elezen was thrown into the corridor. "Damn it, Ezral! Time to go adventuring, I suppose..."

It wasn't long after that exchange that Ezral found himself exploring the area of Western La Noscea. He saw another retainer standing and crying. Ezral had already collected the item his master needed, but this person was in need, and Ezral didn't want to be early, or Master Na'lon would get suspicious. Ezral walked up to the crying retainer. She couldn't have been older than 16 and she had been given an axe and been told to get out there. "Please don't kill me..." The girl sobbed. “No! What do you need?" Ezral replied in a soft tone, careful not to scare the poor girl. "I need a certain item, the Lominsan Sparkler... my master is a big fan of Merlwyb and really wants to impress her." Ezral looked down at his pockets and found the item that U'holha had specifically told him to get. "Here. Have this." Ezral gave the Sparkler that his master wanted so very much, to a girl who deserved it more. "Run along now!" Ezral said to a girl who was now beaming with joy. "Thank you mister! I hope your master treats you well" "I hope so too..." Ezral whispered. The stressed young man picked up an old bronze Allagan coin and walked into the sunset, hoping that the dragoon back home would believe him. He didn't.

[Cabalabob]

Berty, fisherman by day, crime venture don by night. After a long day of organising a raid on the Mist with his fellow retainers once again for various riviera furniture that would not be missed by its owner.

Berty sat down with his most trusted retainer allies to discuss their plans for the next time their masters called upon them. But after a long discussion on the benefits of just grabbing bone crayfish off the beach rather than risking robbing the local adventurers, Berty had enough.

"What are we doing?!" He exclaimed. "I want to do something meaningful with our time! I hear tales of retainers bringing back weapons claimed from primals! Do we really want to be small time housing thieves forever?!".

Berty had made up his mind, he rallied the retainers and told them he wanted to bring back something truly incredible, the mantle of Odin.

The group made their way to the South Shroud where they prepared for battle at Urth's fount. One of the rogues reported in that Odin had been spotted moving towards their position.

The ranged fighters prepared to fire as the melee moved to intercept Odin. Berty, as a simple fisherman, sat back and watched the battle unfold from afar.

The battle was a massacre, none of the retainers were truly prepared for such a battle having spent most of their lives stealing from houses rather than fighting. Gladiators were wiped out with a single swing of Odin's sword, all the mages were petrified fleeing from hall of stone then destroyed by the rain of Gungirs that followed. Finally, Odin took pity on the miserable band of retainers and finished them out with one swift zantetsuken.

Berty watched on in horror as his allies were cut down, but between his shock and fear he saw an opportunity! He drew his fishing rod and cast it at Odin! As Odin walked away from the battle he failed to notice as his mantle was dragged off by Berty's fishing line. He'd done it! He obtained the Odin's mantle -albeit though slightly less heroic means than he expected- and returned to his master.

"Here you go Gunsa! I think you'll be most impressed!" Berty said proudly. Gunsa looked at the Odin's mantle and said "Oh that's new, shame I already have about 25 of these, well here's 2 more venture tokens, now get back out there and find me those Onion Gaskins I want!". Berty looked down at the 2 measly coins, then went and sat back in the beach chairs in the Mist and picked up a bone crayfish as it scuttled by...

Character: Gunsa Cabalabob
World: Sargatanas
Prize: scarf of wondrous wit

[Velvet-Sky]

Character Name: Yuna’ Spira
World Name: Shiva
Item: Mandrgora Choker

-Ul’dah Steps of Thal-

Yuna’ sighed as she saw what her senior retainer Angelina brought back from her latest venture. A simple clam.

“Come on Ange, we spoke about this a moon ago. You’ve been with me since the beginning, back when I was only a glimmer of light and could hardly slay an eft. You should be outshining the others but yet lately our newest girl Zafina has been bringing back better stuff than you” Yuna’ said with a disappointed tone in her voice.

“Mistress, please I’m so sorry. I promise I’ll do better the next time!” Angelina said, the tone in her voice was borderline begging.

Yuna’ held up her hand to silence the retainer.

“I’ve heard this too many times before Angelina. You have one last chance to impress me or I’m afraid I’m going to have to let you go.” Yuna’ said as she assigned the two retainers currently present their newest ventures. With the jobs assigned, Yuna’ teleported off leaving the two behind.

“Don’t worry Angelina, even if you bring something pathetic back tomorrow, I’ll swap items with you” the second retainer, Chris said.

“You would?” Angelina asked cautiously knowing full well that if Chris did something nice towards her, he usually wanted something in return. Ever since Yuna’ hired the two senior retainers, a bitter rivalry was formed between the two mainly because Chris always resented the fact that Yuna’ hired Angelina first over him. Angelina never paid much attention to the reason to why Chris dislike her, but Lynsey (The Miner) had mentioned before that Chris’s family are a known for their careers in the retainer industry.

“12 no! With you out of the way, I’ll finally be the number one retainer!” The retainer said laughing as he turned off walking towards the market place. It was in that brief moment that Angelina considered sending her Carbuncle Madison off in Chris’s direction but ultimately deciding against it as she was in enough trouble with Yuna’ as it is.

“What to do, where to go? What to kill? I could go fishing? No that Zafina’s job now and even I did get her some fish, she’d Swiftcast & Flare me! I could get her some clothes. Yuna’ does her love clothes, I remember when she bought a bikini set for 1m gil before, today its worth like 50k on the markets. That actually might not be a good idea because she’s super picky about her fashion and Stiles tends to handle to clothes related things. That guy does live up to his name. I know! I could-” a noise cut off Angelina’s train of thought.

“Meow”

Angelina looked over to the source of the noise to where she found an overweight borderline obese cat. The fat cat was lying on its side. The poor thing looked like it could hardly move with its weight. It looked super hungry too. Animals in need, it was Angelina’s weakness. When she was growing up, she was known as a friend to the animals, which is why when she entered the retainer career, there was quite a lot of surprised people. Angelina walked over to the poor fortunate cat and gently petted it.

“Meow…” it let out another hungry meow.

“Hold on kitty, I’ve got just the thing for you” Angelina said with a smile on her face while she fished through her inventory for a fish that Yuna’ had rejected the other day.

Angelina fed the cat the fish and smiled to herself as the cat perked up a little bit, it even started purring to her delight. She petted the cat once more before bidding it goodbye and started her way towards North Thanalan. Angelina had remembered that Yuna’ had said something the other day about needing Basilisk eggs for alchemy. She could deal with getting Basilisk eggs.

-Central Thanalan-

Angelina was halfway through Central Thanalan when she heard a familiar sound.

“Meow”

Angelina turned around to see the same fat cat from earlier, standing right in the area of effect of one annoyed cactuar about to cast off his needles into the poor fat cat. It was the animal lover in her that took off into a sprint as she ran to save the fat cat from its soon to be very prickly fate. Just as quick as she ran into the AoE, the fat cat moved a quite an alarming rate out of the AoE. It was in that moment, Angelina just knew that she had messed up.

“Oh twelve…” Angelina said closing her eyes and bracing herself for stings while the cat sat by idly meowing. Madison the carbuncle made quick work of the cactuar while Angelina attempted to remove the needles from her body. The cat waddled up to Angelina and purred while it rubbed itself off her leg.

“Fine, come on then” Angelina muttered giving up on removing the needles. She would have to get Stiles to remove them later with Esuna.

Things had started to go their way again, Angelina and her pet were making quick work of any monsters that stood in their way. Things were going so well that Angelina started to fear something was about to go wrong, unfortunately for her pet, she was right. When Angelina looked around, she had just spotted her carbuncle rescuing the fat cat from the clutches of an antiloin. The cat ran off to Angelina while an angry carbuncle finished off the monster. Madison the carbuncle stomped her way over towards her master and the cat with a rather large bump on her head. The cat meowed happily at Madison and the carbuncle considered attacking the ball of fur and fat. Angelina sensing her pets bloodlust, ushered the two along to the gate into North Thanalan.

-North Thanalan-

They had finally reached their goal. Angelina and Madison were tired and battle worn, but both smiled as they relished in their victory and observed their prize, a high quality looking Basilisk egg. Yuna’ deserved nothing better than high quality. Then the two heard a very weird noise from the third member of their party. Angelina had seen the cats eyes change as its gaze focused on the egg. Angelina had a bad feeling about this. What happened next was all blur for Angelina but all she knew was that she and Madison were chasing that damn fat cat that had stolen their high quality egg.

“AFTER THAT DAMN CAT!” Angelina shouted.

Angelina and Madison chased the creature through the Ceruleum Processing Plant out into the upper wasteland into Garlean patrol territory. They found the egg near some train tracks and the cat was nowhere to be seen. Madison was delighted, she hoped it had been eaten by a monster.

“Meow”

Angelina was annoyed now, she turned around to face the cat and deliver some swift justice until she spotted it sitting on top of rock formation, an area out of her range and coincidentally out of harm’s way. This cat had way more than nine lives.

Something had suddenly caught Angelina’s view out of the corner of her eye. Madison’s tail was standing up dead straight and her back arched into a terrified defensive position. The carbuncle was scared, but it was of what that Angelina was scared to find out. She hesitantly turned to see what was behind them.

“Gor- gor- gor- GORGIMERA!!!!” Angelina screamed.

-Ul’dah Steps of Thal-

Yuna’ surveyed what her retainers had brought back for her, Lynsey had gotten the shards, Zafina had gotten her some fish that she actually requested, Stiles had gotten her some fleece and Chris had gotten yet another impressive item, a piece of furniture for her private house, coincidentally a member of the Free Company that Yuna’ is a member of mentioned he was missing some furniture from his house. Yuna’ had noticed she was missing a retainer.

“Has anyone seen Angelina?” Yuna’ asked with concern.

“Maybe she finally up and quit” Chris said sniggering to which earned him a death glare from his master.

“I’M HERE!!” a hoarse and angry voice roared.

Angelina and Madison staggered towards Yuna’ and her retainers as they stared in shock at the senior retainer and her pet’s appearance. Angelina had needles sticking out of her gear, her hair stood up and was frizzy as if she’d been electrocuted and shoes and gloves had what looked like ice frozen onto them. Angelina’s poor carbuncle Madison had a rather large bump on its head, her fur was singed and her poor tail was black.

“Ange! What happened?!” Yuna’ asked as she saw her retainers appearance.

“THAT HAPPENED!!!” Angelina shouted pointing at the fat cat purring happily behind them.

Angelina relayed the events of what occurred while Stiles worked his healing magic on the two battle worn and bruised pair while Lynsey tackled the mess of Angelina’s hair and Zafina brushed down Carbuncle’s fur.

“So what you’re trying to tell me is that you went quite literally to hell and back just get me a cat?” Yuna’ asked petting the evil creature on the ground. Angelina was about to inform her of what she was really hunting for but Yuna’ cut her off before she could speak.

“OH MY TWELVE! THIS IS LIKE THE BEST PRESENT EVER!!! I LOVE IT!!!” Yuna’ cheered to the surprise of Angelina and Chris.

“Love, you’ve earned yourself a few days off. Now come on kitty lets go show you off” Yuna’ said taking the cat and teleporting away leaving the dumbfounded retainers behind her.

“Ha… ha… Hahaha…. Ha-ha-ha! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!”

The rest of the retainers backed away slowly from Angelina as her laughed did sound quite maniacal and borderline homicidal. The only thing Angelina could do was laugh. Laugh away all the pain, the burns, the freezes, the needles that the damn cat put her and Madison through and laugh off the fact that Yuna’ decided to keep the evil creature as minion?! It was hilarious. On the bright side of things, at least she finally got one over Chris.

[Velvet-Sky]

I only just saw the 1st post in this thread, limited to 500 words.... Damn I didn't see that when I was looking through the rules thread :/ is it possible to re-submit or edit my original post? or is it only 1 post and no changes?

[Lokitti]

It was silly really, he concluded as he surveyed the cliff before him, upon which sat the object of his attention. It wasn’t going to change anything. He wasn’t even sure why he’d become so attached. Of course, he was treated with kindness, paid well, and there was ever a smile awaiting him on his return, whatever he brought back with him... That smile.

With renewed vigour he set about his climb once more, determined to reach his prize this time. Despite the two previous falls, he remained undeterred. He’d been trained as a knight; some small scratches were nothing compared to the broken limbs and wounds he’d seen the Warrior of Light return with.

Other retainers took the opportunity to go fishing or sit by the beach and take it easy; he enjoyed the relatively laid-back adventuring life that being a retainer afforded him. This time, though, he had told himself he was going to bring back something truly special from his explorations. Not a weapon or a piece of armour but something… different.

He finally lifted himself up onto the ledge, and sat for a moment to catch his breath. The view from here was amazing, full moon and clear skies. If only he could have shared this too. Holding a small knife, he reached through the thorns of the rosebush next to him, took the most impressive flower from its branches, and examined it. Yes, this is what he would take back. It was very unusual to find Azeyma Roses growing wild, and he’d taken it as a sign. He had taken only a single rose and left the rest; perhaps one day he would return to this spot with the fabled Warrior of Light and they would find them still growing there.

Twenty minutes to make it back to Mist, he could manage that easily. Climbing back down carefully, he dusted himself off and began the walk back. Passing by other retainers, he greeted them cheerfully. One of them pointed to the flower and whispered to her friend with a giggle as he walked past; he found himself suddenly glad that it was dark and they couldn’t see his face. Was this really a good idea?

He breathed in deeply and continued on the path down to the mansion.

“Ah! There you are!” The voice stopped him in his tracks, he looked around and saw the Warrior of Light standing there, fresh from an adventure of their own, holding two Ishgardian Teas. His favourite, he thought. Wonderful!

“For you.” He took the tea gratefully and held out the rose with a small bow. And watched. And waited. The Warrior of Light smiled. Not just a normal smile but one that lit up a whole face.

“I-I... Thank you… This was... Unexpected. It’s beautiful.” If there was a blush on those cheeks, he wasn’t going to mention it.

He smiled warmly and sipped his tea, glad to see that his gift had been graciously received.

Character: Loki Laufey'son
Realm: Shiva
Prize Choice: Ahriman Choker

[zoe_bug71]

Jusn was just sitting down to drink his tea when he heard the sound of that god awful bell. Sighing, he accepted his summons and went to his master's side. "Yes <sigh> I hope this doesn't take long he complained to his master. His master glared at him until he produced the fruits of his labour....Jet Black Dye. His master smiled at him, pleased with his work. Thank God, Jusn thought, she will let me take a break now. But no, his master produced 2 measly venture coins and gestured for him to go out again. Jusn was very annoyed by this. He'd already done 5 ventures today and here was his master, forcing him to go out yet again. Sigh. So off he went. As he was walking along the road leading out of the Ul'dah town centre, he saw something glint out of the corner of his eye....quickly he rushed over to investigate. Digging carefully through the dirt, he discovered a treasure chest over flowing with Allagan pieces and Gems. What a find, he thought to himself. My master will be very pleased. But Jusn frowned at that last thought. Why should his master get all this gold? Here he was, doing all the hard work and what did he have to show for it? 2 venture coins. Well, Jusn thought to himself....my master will never know what I actually found. So he grabbed his find and returned to his room to await his next summons. A hour later, he heard the ring of the bell. Grinning to himself he accepted the summons and went to his master's side. "Well, that was exhausting..." he said to her. She ignored him and held out her hand. Reaching into his inventory Jusn produced his prize from the venture. A single piece of Allagan Tin. He smiled to himself as he watched her face fill with disappointment. Just another day in the life of a retainer he thought to himself!



Character: Lalasa Bell
World: Tonberry
Prize: Bluebird Earring

[Klokwerk]

Character name: Klokwerk Heart
World name: Malboro
In-game Prize: Scarf of Wondrous Wit

"All over Eorzea, Free Company houses and personal homes alike have had their roofs taken in the night. Sources claim to have seen bright lights and saucer shaped objects above the Goblet. Could this be the fabled Pupu of legend?"
Kimera stares blankly at the news article before crumpling it up and tossing it into a nearby bin. She doesn't care for supernatural fairy tails of aliens stealing peoples roof tops in the night. She hasn't the time for such fancies, not if shes going to earn enough ventures for a house of her own. And with that she returns to the Goblet where her employer would be waiting with a handful of shiny ventures.