Retainer Ad-Venture Contest (EU) - Entry Thread

[Pepean_Gogoan]

Character name: Pepean Gogoan
World: Lich
Prize: Scarf of Wondrous Wit

I could not have asked for a better start to the day. The sun was bright, the birds were singing, my tea was just the right temperature, and I had just purchased the latest novel by Jajara Totora. I thought nothing could go wrong. Just as I opened the front cover the sound of my master’s summoning bell rang out. I often question if he times his summonings in such a manner. Being bound by my retainer duties, I was forced to answer the call.

Once I arrived I noticed that Master Pepean had that twinkle in his eye which usually meant he had a task planned for me that would involve venturing out into The Black Shroud. One must wonder why master is not willing to go out and perform this task himself, but far be it for me to question my employer. Sure enough, he wanted me to set out on a field exploration, with naught but a rusty sword to protect myself with. Come to think of it, why did master, a veteran White Mage, have this old sword he had me equip? Then again, with tales being told around Eorzea of my master challenging Primals to dance competitions, I believe he lost his sanity many moons ago.

Thus I made my way into the Shroud. Upon leaving Gridania’s walls I noticed a group of strange white, floating, fluffy creatures with big red balls above their heads. I had heard tales of such creatures before, Moogles I believe they are called, but never did I imagine such things actually existed. Curious as to what activities these creatures partook in, I carefully followed them. After following them a while, we ended up in a small clearing. It was there that I saw him. A crown atop his head, and wielding a mighty blade, there was no doubt this was Good King Moggle Mog XII, another being I thought only a myth. There was no doubt this was a Primal summoning. “I must warn master!” I thought. But I need proof of my claims. So, with a deep gulp, I mustered up all the courage I could find, and dashed towards the beast, sword in hand. With one swift strike, I cut off one of the beast’s whiskers, and dashed back towards Gridania as fast as I could.

When I reunited with master, I presented him with the whisker and prepared to warn him about the oncoming Primal threat.
“A whisker?!” he responded before I could speak, “Are you even trying when you’re out there?!”
To say I was shocked and offended would be an understatement.
“Very sorry Master Pepean,” I sarcastically replied, “I shall make a better effort next time.”
With that, my master discarded the whisker, a part of a Primal no doubt worth a small fortune, into the lake. All my bravery in the face of certain doom was for nothing. I do honestly question why I continue in this line of work at times.

[ruskie]

Character: Asny Rak'nys
World: Cerberus
Choice: Bluebird earrings

Karra sighs as she once again finds herself with a venture token in her hand. "How clumsy she was when we were kids, now she's the hero and I'm the one running around helping her out with various things" she scans the list given to her. "Hmm yak milk and cockatrice thigh, could be worse" she murmurs to herself and heads towards the nearest yak.

As she collects the milk she reflects back on how they used to train together and hunt together. Then that incident happened. She still wakes up in a cold sweat sometimes from it. She places the milk on the cart to be taken away and heads towards the Hinterlands - looking around to see if she finds anything else along the way while day dreaming how nice it would be to be the hero.

As she travels the Forelands she spots Okina in the distance and waves to her. The lalafel waves back and they keep going their separate ways both on their own tasks. She reaches the Hinterlands and sets off towards Idyllshire. She avoids the various gobo patrols. "Sigh, since that damn thing came out of the lake they've been everywhere" she mutters to herself as she walks up to Idyllshire and heads towards the Ruling Quarter.

She nears the cockatrices and pauses, crouching low and drawing her bow while listening for any signs of movement around her. Nothing heard, she takes aim at a lone cockatrice and releases the arrow. It flies true and downs it in one shot. She approaches cautiously drawing her knife. She cuts off the thighs and as she is about to sneak away hears a sound behind her. She turns around arrow drawn but the cockatrice lounges and hits her. She feels the petrifaction taking hold in her shoulder where she got hit.

She quickly gets up and starts running away hoping to clear the area before she gets petrified. She manages to get behind a rock just as the petrifaction sets in and she is unable to move.

As she de petrifies she sees Okina standing in front of her saying "The cockatrices again?" and Karra nods and in her usual flippant manner throws out a "Thank you".

They set off back to Gridania. On the way back she's thinking that really it's not that bad being a retainer - even if it is for your friend. She generally gets me some nice gear and sometimes she even gets me gear just for me not hand-me-downs. And I do enjoy the hunting trips though that one time when I got too close to the Garleans - that brought back some bad memories - she shudders as she nears the bell just as Asny steps up to it. She waves to her and points at the cart, Asny looks, nods and steps to her and gives her a hug. "Thanks for all the help my friend."

[Ergy]

Ah, Baderon, I need another pint.
Hm? Oh, I'm ok, I'm just out of ideas for finding my adventurer the perfect gift for her quick venture. I feel like I've tried everything but nothing is good enough...
I know, I know, a lot of the retainers relax for 23 of the allotted hours and then fish a bit of malm kelp out the harbour on their way to report in, but that's not my style. I mean, I like my adventurer. She's the warrior of light, she's saved Eorzea so many times that I want to bring her back something to make her smile, you know?
But Baderon, I've tried everything. I mean it. I soloed garuda and gave her the sword, and I got this look that said 'do I look like a bleeding gladiator?' And she's not, I know this. Thal's balls, everyone knows this! But I tried so damned hard.
The next two times I went out I gave her fish.
Of course she wasn't impressed! But I had Halone's fury coursing through me, so the way her nose wrinkled at the smell, oh it was worth it!
I bet if I beat bahamut and presented her with his head to mount on the wall it still wouldn't be enough. To tell you the truth, I know it wouldn't. I gave her behemoth's head and what did she do? Only gave it straight back to me to sell on the auction house!
I'm at a loss, Baderon. There was this one time, I got so close to making her happy. I hold of some of that silver dye and she actually used it!
No. No... more of the dye isn't going to work. I thought it would, but she just shoved it in my bags for safekeeping. And trust me, I've tried other colours. She couldn't have been less impressed.
Huh? Baderon, she is not going to want that cat. No one is going to want a cat that fat. Seriously, what have you been feeding it?
Not to worry. I'm sure you'll find some lazy retainer willing to take it off your hands, but just like the malm kelp, that's not for me. If I keep making the effort, eventually I'll get it. I know I will.
How long do I have left to think of something this time? Good question. Less than usual - I took some time to recover from the last week's worth of venturing, but it's fine. I know I still need to think of something but I've got...
Baderon. Your clock... it's not accurate, is it?
Althyk save me! I've only got 5 minutes left! What am I going to do? I can't go back empty handed! Help!
No. Just no. The last thing she's ever going to want is that fat cat. I'd rather give her malm kelp that that wretched cat...
...
...
What's the quickest way to the harbour from here?

-----
Name: Ergy Pathfinder
World: Phoenix
Item: Mandragora choker

[YuiKitahara]

===Retainer's blog===


Yesterday I overheard Master Faye talking about my ventures with her friends, complaining that I brought her fish again.
Stubborn girl, miqo'te should eat more fish!
Sometimes I have to grill it (by Fire III) before going back in case she releases the fish directly. Ugh this is not a master, this is a daughter... a curious one.


One day I passed by Ifrit's house and went in to have a chit chat with him, then anyhow picked one drop for my master from the warehouse since they're in excess of demand. But when I came back:

"You killed Ifrit? "
"Have you get hurt? Seems no..."
"Where did you meet it?"
"How did you get him down?"
"Can you teach me?"
"Bring me along next tiiiimmmmeeee..."

I can't answer because of the code of conduct. But doesn't she know that primals are our retainers' friends?


There is one more thing which is not happening in my exploration but already affected my choice. It's about furniture.
Retainers all can pick furniture from their ventures, legal and nothing special.
However, master can't understand and thinks that I am doing dirty work.
She is worried, saying I must be careful in case being caught, being jailed at a secret place. She will be notified by a moogle, need to travel around, to find out clues for the place, to ask friends' help and form a raid party to get her naughty retainer back, maybe will need to pay a huge amount of ransom even meet the final boss, oh if so she will prefer giving up and let boss grill me as compensation...

What?! I'm just a cute nice and sweet lalafell. @-@

It's too stressed to listen to my master. I'm going to pick... umm to fish a fish, yes a fish.


Character name: R'faye Morielli
World name: Tonberry
Prize: Bluebird Earring

[Devils_Lawyer]

Character name: Devils Lawyer
World: Cactuar
Prize: Scarf of Wondrous Wit


WHAM!
The door slammed shut so hard one might think the hinges would fall off.

I guess it’s never been easy to please Devils Lawyer, those venture coins can’t be cheap and even if you try your hardest it sometimes isn’t enough.

Take yesterday’s venture for example, from the Mist housing area with the sun in my back and the coins in my pockets I ventured out to make my boss proud, amazing delicious loot is on the shopping list and if anyone is going to get it it’s going to be me and boy did things go smooth, primal’s fell left and right, garleans ran in fear and I even manage to snag someone’s rooftop in the process.

As I was walking past Aleport, struggling to carry all the loot I spotted a gentleman and his company, I guess he must have been wealthy cause his left leg was replaced with a wooden pole made of nothing but the finest cedar lumber and if I wasn’t mistaken that eye patch covering his right eye was made out of pure dragon leather.

-Greetings beautiful, may I ask what one such as yourself would be heading with all that heavy stuff.

The man smiled at me with his mouth full of gold teeth.

-I’m heading with this stuff to my boss over at the Mist.

-Well now you shouldn’t have to carry this clutter all the way like this, I and my boys are heading out on a….fishing trip and we could just as easily drop you off at the beach.

I hesitated for a bit, boss did tell me not to talk to strangers but then again he was not here and my back was aching,

-Sure, I said and as I put down the items on the ground the man and his group got a shimmer in their eyes the likes which I’ve never seen, clearly the very thought of being able to help a poor retainer must be like gil in their pockets.
They quickly grabbed everything and started heading towards Aleport docks and before I could say by the twelve we were heading out into the sea on their mighty ship.

As I was standing on deck looking out unto the horizon I could hear footsteps from behind, the man and his sailors walked up to me.

-I’m not sure if you have figured it out yet but were not fishermen, we are pirates and we are now going to take your loot then have you scrub the entire deck har har har.

The men laughed out loud.

-But you are going to drop me off at the Mist right?

The men laughed even harder.

By nightfall they had me tied up with ropes in the deck below along with my items and other things they had stolen.
Luckily you learn a thing or two as a retainer so getting out of the ropes was easy, I carefully dragged my stuff up on the deck and heaved them into a rowboat hanging on the side of the boat, there was an open crate of honey lemons in it.
Suddenly I was spotted by a drunken sailor.

-Hey yu….yu are schteelin our schtuff yu…yu…..

The man fell asleep on the deck again and I used one of the swords I had acquired from my venture to cut the ropes allowing the rowboat to fall down into the water.
Unfortuenly my luck quickly turned as a huge storm approached, I was thrown all kinds away in the rainy night and suddenly my rowboat flipped itself and all the stuff sank to the bottom of the ocean and i managed to grab onto the bottom of the boat and held on for dear life.

I must have passed out, I woke up in no other place then the Mist beach itself.
As I was walking across the beach, wet and sandy with ripped clothes I stumbled upon one of the lemons that were in the crate in the rowboat.
I smiled with joy, my venture was a complete success and I ran as quickly as I could to my boss’s door and knocked as hard as I could.

The door opened and on the other side was my boss and I handed the lemon to him with a smile so big you could have thought I won a million MGP.

He looked at me, said nothing and then slammed the door shut on me…

[Galis]

"I'm back, ma'am!" said a female, red-headed Miqo'te . "Hello? Are you there?"
"Who is the cutest kitty in the world? Who is?? Of course you are!"
Kätzchen smiled. "Oh ma'am, thank y..."
"Oh hi, Käztchen. How was your adventure?"

Then the Miqo'te realized what kitty was Lichte talking to. That damn coeurl kitten. Oh yeah, it was so cute that even she wanted to hug it. But she was a bit jealous too. She wanted to be the only kitty her mistress had. So she gave Lichte the reward of her adventure and thought about a plan.

That night, Kätzchen waited until Lichte fall asleep. The coeurl was sleeping next to her bed, so she took it. Even if she was training to became an archer, she knew some magical spells too. One of them was to change physical appearance. So she cast the spell and the kitten was transformed into an ugly morbol. The miqo'te came back to her bed smiling after leaving the new pet when it was before.

Next morning, Lichte woke up and the first thing she saw was a morbol. She started calling her kitten but it didn't appear. She called then her retainer. She suspected she had done something at the pet.
"Yes, ma'am?"
"Käztchen, have you seen my coeurl kitten this morning?"
"Uh, no, ma'am. Sorry."
"Are you sure? Don't lie to me."
"Maybe... it could be... I changed it a bit?"
"Into a morbol, you mean?"
"Yeah..."
"But why did you do something like that?"
"I was jealous, 'cause I used to be your only kitty and then that thing appeared and..."
"But, you don't need to be jealous! You're not a pet to me. You're my friend. I though you already knew that..."

Those simple words made Kätzchen feel better. She even removed the spell of the coeurl and patted it for the first time.
"Oooh, you're really cute. You know, if you were a grown Miqo'te instead of a little coeurl maybe we could..."
"Kätzchen! Leave the poor kitty!"
"Yes, ma'am. Sorry, ma'am. Is there any adventure you want me to do?"

Character name: Lichte Kalten
World: Ragnarok
Prize: Bluebird Earring

[Gaignen]

SNIPPITY

So I was evidently overexcited and missed the part about a word limit. Guess I'll write it again. Gah.

[-Krypyonite-]

Character name : Achalys Frostbolt
World : Lich
Prize wanted: Ahriman chocker
________________________________________-
Well, i'm not sure if rules allow it, but it said a ''short story''. Bards in taverns tell them all the time, so here it goes the tale of Miss Fortune, from the retainers prespective. (pun intended) (if i can't submit this, please say.)


For money and glory.
I bring Honey and story
No time to say sorry

Master wasn’t fond,
Of the fortune I’ve been had
The contract meant to end
In his eyes I saw mad

Stolen from his Neighbor
“Why a goddamn roof?!”
With sneaking and labor
From this crime was no proof!

For venture I travel
For venture I wander,
I entered the Navel
Then fled in a thunder

Redemption was possible,
I listen the whisper
A one last resolve:
A sole Kingly Whisker!

With Might but no Aim
I stay strong,
I take claim

I began to understand
Like a child with a toy,
With Gil in his hand
In his eyes I saw joy.

[Werhusky]

Character: Aelia Sokoto
World: Cerberus
Item: Scarf of Woundrous Wit


Zorgan weighted the ventures in his purse. The payment was definitely worth all the travelling and he got to see a lot of all of Eorzea. The taste in his mouth told him today was a good day to get something worthy for his mistress.
She was another reason he did this job; it was just too fun seeing her roll eyes, her suppressed anger and her occasional joy about things he found for her. A smile stole on his lips. In another life they could’ve been friends but in this life he was her rebellious retainer.
Some deep breaths and he had decided where to go to: It was a somewhat risky decision to go to Cape Westwind but time was running and his Miqo’te genes made it easy for him to hide from the Garleans and there he had found already some sweet things before, lost by some poor souls.
Under the clear sky only those fishers trying to catch a titanic sawfish – for a moment he considered to try his own luck – distracted him a bit from searching between rocks, in caves and down the canyon. And there it was! A minute mindflayer was lying close to the water. But how to get it before the next wave carried it to the deeps of the ocean?
He almost laughed at the easy solution. Good thing he knew how to convince people of his trustworthiness and got borrowed a Halcyon Rod. With a handful of skilled casts he managed to hook it. He handed back the rod to the baffled fisher and couldn’t prevent himself from cuddling the minion for a moment. Really a good day!
He set foot to head back to Limsa Lominsa, where she’d expect him soon. That he let fall all cautiousness he only noticed when the Vanguard almost hit him. Holding the minion tight he ran as fast as he could and only stopped when the attacker was left far behind.
Zorgan leaned towards some rocks catching his breath. How stupid of him there! Well, it happened but now he should go. Pushing himself from the rocks to leave he heard a clinging sound. “Sigh!” His purse broke. Angrily he started collecting the ventures that had rolled everywhere.
Now it really was about time! Without looking he reached for the mindflayer – and only got some slime on his hand. Suspiciously he turned and his fears got proven: He looked at some stupid grinning toads. In his rage all that escaped was a long “Aaaaaaahhhhhhh!” The toads backed off but the minion was lost. Angry about his faults he made his was to be ready…

The bell rang and he greeted her the usual easy way. “What did you get for me?” He handed her what he could organize in the rush. “A Lominsan Anchovy!?” A grin stole on his face: “It’s high quality.” “Yeah….” Without asking more she handed him new ventures and dismissed him. What a great day!

[AngelHorn]

Stay a while and listen. This is a story, a short story, about three glorious adventurers. Well, maybe not so glorious... they are retainers. But they dine in the luxury of the Drowning Wench like real adventurers. Well... actually they have to take a table in the cellar... since they cannot afford more.

It is a story about the proud Elezen Elviane, the kittenish Miqo'te A'zumyn and the Lalafell Yobiwan, who is a little late to their appointment.

"*Sigh* I wish we could be real adventurers like the people upstairs. Y'know, sharing tales of heroic adventures and most of all: having real meals instead this crap they call 'Retainer Special'. Don't you agree, Elvi?"
"I agree. But sadly the prices here have been driven sky-high due all the wealthy adventurers, so there is not much choice for our kind.", Elviane replied.
"Nyan! It sounded so cool back then on the billboard when it said 'The Adventurer Guild wants YOU! Hiring helpers - apply now and get one free set of Patrician's clothes.' But being a retainer sucks. I want adventures. I want glory! I want food! Now, where is Yobi? It's already ten minutes past noon and I am very hungry!"
"Look, Ms. Tyaka.", Elviane points at a cute looking Lalafell in a bunny costume from Gold Saucer who is heading for their table. "Maybe that little Ms. is a friend of Yobiwan?"
To their surprise the Lalafell took a seat at their table and started to burst out in tears.
Unsure about what to do A'zumyn asked the Lalafell "Uhm... can we help you somehow, sweety?"
The Lalafell glanced at her. Then towards Elviane. After a few seconds he finally replied "It's me. Yobi."
A'zumyn and Elviane looked at each other, then back to Yobiwan before bursting out in laughter.
"IT'S NOT FUNNY! GODDAMMIT!", Yobiwan cried. Which made the two girls laugh even harder at him.
"My mistress wanted me to wear this glamour while being on venture. She thought it would look cute on me. Despite me being a guy..."
"I heard a lot about retainer masters who makes their retainers wear lewd stuff, but this... is so... cute! Nyan."
"Now," Elviane calmed herself enough to say something "we have about 30 minutes left for our quick exploration. What gifts do we want to bring our masters today?"
"I don't care, nyan! I want food! Onaka suita!"
"I am not in any mood for exploration with this outfit..."
"Ladies", Baderon Tenfinger interrupted the three to serve the lunch. "Today our special is eel pie with roasted sea cucumber and cooked crayfish. Enjoy your meal!"
"I AM NOT A GIRL!", Yobiwan tried to complain but Baderon turned away already.
It sounded terrible. It looked terrible. A'zumyn was the first to ask "Is this even edible? Nyan..."
"Unlikely. But this is what you get for two ventures..."
The three of them exchanged glances and started to grin together.
"Ladies, we have our gifts!", Yobiwan explained.

To be continued...?

Character Name: Angel Horn
World Name: Cerberus
Prize Choice: Scarf of Wondrous Wit

Sorry for my bad English, it is not my native language.