Character name: Devils Lawyer
World: Cactuar
Prize: Scarf of Wondrous Wit


WHAM!
The door slammed shut so hard one might think the hinges would fall off.

I guess it’s never been easy to please Devils Lawyer, those venture coins can’t be cheap and even if you try your hardest it sometimes isn’t enough.

Take yesterday’s venture for example, from the Mist housing area with the sun in my back and the coins in my pockets I ventured out to make my boss proud, amazing delicious loot is on the shopping list and if anyone is going to get it it’s going to be me and boy did things go smooth, primal’s fell left and right, garleans ran in fear and I even manage to snag someone’s rooftop in the process.

As I was walking past Aleport, struggling to carry all the loot I spotted a gentleman and his company, I guess he must have been wealthy cause his left leg was replaced with a wooden pole made of nothing but the finest cedar lumber and if I wasn’t mistaken that eye patch covering his right eye was made out of pure dragon leather.

-Greetings beautiful, may I ask what one such as yourself would be heading with all that heavy stuff.

The man smiled at me with his mouth full of gold teeth.

-I’m heading with this stuff to my boss over at the Mist.

-Well now you shouldn’t have to carry this clutter all the way like this, I and my boys are heading out on a….fishing trip and we could just as easily drop you off at the beach.

I hesitated for a bit, boss did tell me not to talk to strangers but then again he was not here and my back was aching,

-Sure, I said and as I put down the items on the ground the man and his group got a shimmer in their eyes the likes which I’ve never seen, clearly the very thought of being able to help a poor retainer must be like gil in their pockets.
They quickly grabbed everything and started heading towards Aleport docks and before I could say by the twelve we were heading out into the sea on their mighty ship.

As I was standing on deck looking out unto the horizon I could hear footsteps from behind, the man and his sailors walked up to me.

-I’m not sure if you have figured it out yet but were not fishermen, we are pirates and we are now going to take your loot then have you scrub the entire deck har har har.

The men laughed out loud.

-But you are going to drop me off at the Mist right?

The men laughed even harder.

By nightfall they had me tied up with ropes in the deck below along with my items and other things they had stolen.
Luckily you learn a thing or two as a retainer so getting out of the ropes was easy, I carefully dragged my stuff up on the deck and heaved them into a rowboat hanging on the side of the boat, there was an open crate of honey lemons in it.
Suddenly I was spotted by a drunken sailor.

-Hey yu….yu are schteelin our schtuff yu…yu…..

The man fell asleep on the deck again and I used one of the swords I had acquired from my venture to cut the ropes allowing the rowboat to fall down into the water.
Unfortuenly my luck quickly turned as a huge storm approached, I was thrown all kinds away in the rainy night and suddenly my rowboat flipped itself and all the stuff sank to the bottom of the ocean and i managed to grab onto the bottom of the boat and held on for dear life.

I must have passed out, I woke up in no other place then the Mist beach itself.
As I was walking across the beach, wet and sandy with ripped clothes I stumbled upon one of the lemons that were in the crate in the rowboat.
I smiled with joy, my venture was a complete success and I ran as quickly as I could to my boss’s door and knocked as hard as I could.

The door opened and on the other side was my boss and I handed the lemon to him with a smile so big you could have thought I won a million MGP.

He looked at me, said nothing and then slammed the door shut on me…