Gonna give a brief look into how things are done now and why they are different from before, as far as perspective of being new or learning and how it's handled goes. Back in the day (over a decade ago), there was no such thing as cross-server dungeons, nor was there such a thing as solo queue... for the most part. The games were developed under the pretense that people will form relationships with each other under a minimal mutual ground of wanting to do content or help each other. Be friendly and help one another to (essentially) build up your own potential army of friends to play the game with and experience content, including massive raids. No one wanted to group with the renowned ninja looter of the server, or a player with horrible attitude, so they were often very restricted on what they can and can't do... for obviously good reason. The tech was certainly a huge reason why that was the extent of being able to experience content, but it became part of the MMORPG identity. New players meant potentially more friends to make (building up that army). So long as said newbie wasn't a d-bag, most folks weren't going to be mean to them. Even the GMs and devs were usually quick to respond to inappropriate behavior, be it cheating or harassment, and dish out proper punishments. Some of which were humorous to the innocent, as you could clearly tell they were just trolling the wrongdoers or actually out to actively harm their play experience.

Fast-forward to today and things have changed. These days, you can be however you want to be without much consequence, save for the serious harassment or threats bit. While it's obviously not approved of with this game, cheating really doesn't have much risk here. Not referring to practically harmless parsers, but rather botting and hacking. Just ask any of the countless number of the legit players who had bot their way to 60 on multiple/all jobs with no repercussions, despite reports and video evidence. We're essentially allowed to be a lot more wild than before, but that's more of a different topic.

The devs today still hold to the making friends bit of the old. They simply have the tech now to make it easier/possible to do things solo, in terms of giving you a means to access content. This, along with how people view their games, gives folks the illusion that the game is all about themselves and their experience alone. So when you venture into that territory, you're going to inevitably meet mouthbreathers like that. Heck, it's definitely something you'd encounter to a lesser extent even outside it. As many people can attest to, statics tend to breed drama sooner or later. The important thing to remember though is that they are, by ratio, but a small part of the whole. With the fact these games are far more popular now than they were a decade ago, the actual numbers have increased, but ratio is still relatively low.

TL;DR - You're not doing anything wrong. Most complainers are just... THAT type of person. That kid in the class that no one likes, probably because he/she is of mind to think they're better than everyone else.