I had to use Elusive Jump in my opener every run of T7 progression until my Warrior finally learned to git gud and stop losing hate to me. Since then, I've had no issues, either aside from when my MT derps and forgets Shield Oath or Grit, in which case that boss is mine by a mile before he gets to the end of his first enmity combo. In DF, though, I don't expect other Tanks to have undergone my Trial By Fire, so I expect to pull hate off bad tanks in boss fights. I still don't use Elusive Jump, because I have more defense and health than a fresh 60 tank in 145 whites, full-vit spec.
The "My Tank is Undergeared" defense is ludicrous, by the way, so let's stop using that. I even tested this myself. I contracted the best Dragoon I knew at the time (who I was actually friends with) alongside my bff Scholar friend to come do Titan HM with me as Warrior wearing item level 60 gear near the end of SCoB progression. The Dragoon was full 110 with his Gae Bolg Nexus (115). I was i60 with my i60 axe from Ifrit HM. He never used Elusive Jump, because I asked him not to. I never once struggled with hate - in fact no one ever even came *CLOSE* to pulling off me, especially as the fight went on. As I recall, I was wearing full VIT, as well, because I was shitting my pants about Mountain Buster one-shotting me;;; thankfully i110 Adloquiums can save your ass! C:
That was a 50 item level difference. I had no issues. The problem isn't - and never was - gear difference. The problem is people not understanding their job and therefore doing it poorly.. When you're outgeared, you need to focus on enmity generation over dps. You shouldn't try and be a cool Sword Oath paladin against i190 dps while you're rocking i145 whites. You're playing wrong if you do. Similarly, you shouldn't be running Shield Oath and using GB>RA>RA. It should be GB>RoH>RoH until you actually build a buffer.
Yes, tanks have a secondary job to do as much dps as they can, but this job is codified as: "Tanks should dish out as much dps as they can while maintaining enmity on all targets they are tasked with holding." The bolded part is called your main job. If you can't do that, stop trying to do more dps. That's basically it. That's the whole discussion. In short~
If you're losing hate to the dps as a tank, here's what you do:
Stop blaming your gear.
Stop blaming the "bad dps who pull hate off me"
Start re-evaluating what you're doing and how you can do it better.
Every tank has options to enhance their enmity generation. You just have to actually use them. And use them properly.