As a Monk, or any other job without detaunt, I just try to switch targets for awhile if i notice that the tank is about to lose aggro over me to give them time to secure aggro back (unless the mob is obviously about to die). Honestly I just feel that many players aren't mindful enough about the nuances of the other 2 perspectives outside of dps and are quick to make knee-jerk reactions because they aren't often tracking their own enmity when it's very high.