FFXIV is based too much on extrinsic, rather than intrinsic, motivation. In FFXIV, the fun comes from the rewards much more so than the activities done to obtain the rewards. Most activities aren't fun in and of themselves. That's a real problem, especially when even the rewards are less exciting than in other games. We have ONE BiS set, it is ONLY obtainable from a combination of tomes and the current endgame raid, and the itemization is BLAND (yay bigger numbers).

This is how to fix FFXIV's problems:

- More customization - Multiple BiS options depending on your style/build (Yoshi apparently thinks "Builds? What are those?"), multiple avenues of obtaining BiS gear (reputation, crafting/gathering, etc.), and more interesting itemization (10% bonus to Rampart, Reduced Cooldown of Hallowed Ground, or whatever).

- Fewer grinds - If you're relying on extrinsic motivation to compel people to play, you need a system of rewards that pays people more reliably for their efforts. The original pony drop rate was so low that ponies felt like an excellent reward if you happened to get them, but where very few people would actively try to get them. The same is true of fishing at times, Triple Triad cards, etc. If you rely on extrinsic motivation, players need to be able to make a steady, measurable progress. Otherwise, players are doing activities with no intrinsic reward (i.e. not fun) AND no extrinsic reward (i.e. not ever achieving anything for time spent).

Note: This is IF you're relying on extrinsic motivation alone. Ideally, all game elements would be enjoyable in and of themselves (i.e. fun grinds).

- Focus more on improving intrinsic motivation - When you introduce a feature like Triple Triad, try to be less limiting about what cards players can use (or continue making tiers, like at 90 cards, for example) and don't give such unfair advantages to NPCs (like random rule when they have a pool of 5-7 cards and you have a pool of 90). If players have to challenge an NPC with rules like random and chaos, it feels like they're not even PLAYING Triple Triad (since 2 of the 3 decisions they make are stripped away from them). SE seems to find a way to ruin new features that would be fun (Triple Triad, Housing, etc.)

TLDR version of all of this: players need a deeper game than what FFXIV is. Until that happens, FFXIV is just a shallow lobby-game that relys on addiction-making elements (addiction in the true sense, not "I really, really enjoy this activity")