Doesn't matter if that first bit wasn't your point. It's the exact same mentality just on the other side of the coin. "You will all have to change your play style and adapt to me just because I don't want to play my role the way it was designed." How is that any different from expecting people to play the way your raid group wants you to? You become the person trying to herd sheep with that mentality. The only way to truly avoid that drama is to do group content with friends only. Speaking of...
Raiding's not for everybody. I know I don't raid because I don't like how strict it is. But MMOs, like it or not, need raiders to drive game development. They can't sustain a game by themselves, but they're the ones who complete content quickly and challenge the devs to make quality content faster. Games without raiding stagnate due to slow, if any, updates. Games that focus too much on raiding exclude too many people.
As for the actions thing, what good does adding another crowd control ability to a BLM toolkit where every other spell/attribute is already an AoE or assists in AoE? That's no different than adding a redundant spec. Every single skill that gets added needs to have a purpose and shouldn't be there just because someone wants choice. And we already have this with cross class skills. You can literally take off our soul stone and cross class just about any skill from any of the other classes to use. Play other classes and look at what skills can cross with yours to give a unique style. People are already doing it with their own groups and are having a good time.
"Implementing that cool new ability for Class A without worrying if that would make said class OPed" is called balancing. You're literally using what you claim to be the cause of this game being boring as your argument for why more skills could be added. And again, you're not suggesting anything new. We've got new skills, and people are chosing whether or not they wish to use them. Raiders will, obviously. But plenty of people are rebelling and aren't. That's their personal choice. Party with people that agree with those choices because there's plenty there.