When I started I was always capping gear and had to had the best gear.
Then I realised it doesnt matter, I only do ex primals and dungeons so i dont even need the best gear
And well after that, I log in, try to get cute glamour gear, level alts, and all that.
But I agree with you. I think what I dislike the most is that new gear is just another number, theres nothing interesting that makes you think if you REALLY want that piece or if the one you have has a better effect that you want to keep.

So if the patches dont have cute things, like pink skirts and shoes. I only log in to chat in my fc, or maybe do an ex primal for fun and then play something else.
This is not a game I'd recommend putting in too much time into because it all feels so.. hmm..useless. Yay I got my ilvl 180 gea. Next day its outdated cause i got my ilvl 190 gear etc.