I meant no offense. Castlevania stretches a wide breath of genres, but always seems to prefer to refer to itself as an action adventure - and not an RPG. So I was courious as to the games and elements that lead you to add it into the RPG genre. I was not judging you. I'm glad for the clarifcation.
This said, I focused on Castlevania not for the fact that it was different from the Genre you were talking about, but rather because it holds elements I wanted to talk to you about. Specificly the fact that many of the Castlevania games are actually quite similar in nature. In fact, several of the Classic Castlevania games, (I, III, IV, Bloodlines, Dracula X (and Chronicles) etc.) are actually very close permutations of one another. Yet, you list them as some of the games you remember fondly, yes?
This is because there is no contrast of expectation, you expected more of the same from these games. But, when they did change, you still played them and enjoyed them.
Heavensward is much the same as its predecessor, because it seeks to refine on its successes, rather than make a radical deviation from its previous iteration. It seeks refinement, rather than revolution.
As far as your concern in difficulty, remember that in some of the Castlevania games, there were 'Hardmode' versions of those games? The loot pool between it and the others were identical. I ask you, honestly, did you feel your achievement in beating the games on Hard Mode feel cheapened by those who acquired items in Normal?
What I would ask of you, for your own enjoyment, is to approach the game as an Action-Adventure game, like Castlevania. Yes, it has Roleplay Elements, yes, it has multiplayer elements. Technically it is an MMORPG, but it plays very much like an action-adventure game with RPG elements.
I feel we place too much expectation on 'Genre's' these days that we forget ourselves and the elements that are similar in other genre's that we find fun. FFXI and other MMOs, they are their own games. I don't try to compare them. That's with FFXI being my first and most played MMORPG. That's as a Legacy member.
Skizzle, I do hope you find enjoyment in the game again. My best advice is to approach it with a clean slate, devoid of expectation, with the same awaited joy you would a Castlevania title. Don't worry about the achievements of others - they're not a part of your game, any different than someone who plays a console title on their own elsewhere. Focus on your own achievements, at your own pace, and the time you get to spend with those you care about and who's company you enjoy in the game.
And always remember, you can beat the game on Hardmode while others are struggling with normal. That's where you can feel accomplished.
Anyways, hope you stick with it. Don't get discouraged, this is just a game, like any other. There's no need to treat it any more special then the library of single-player games behind you.