Anxiety fears that came true last night

[Nafka]

Part 1

So before I start this post I want to make sure people understand where I am coming from.

I have played MANY other MMO's but this one is so different in many ways and I have stayed away from it because it just did not grab my attention till recent.

I like a few other folks that I have read about on here suffer from social anxiety and being with other people. In other MMO's I did partcipate in some social activites like guild social events or other things that did not involve dungeons, pvp or any of this type of activity.

I have only been playing this game for about 2 weeks now (stating on free trial then converting) so im still learning the game and the roles. I was unaware your main quest story lines force you to play Dungeons and boss battles.

[Nafka]

Part 2

Im a tank role (G) and have decided to level it all the way to 50 first as others have suggested.

My experience with the first 3 Dungeons was good with people understanding this is my first time doing them, im a new player and ive never done this sort of thing in MMO's before (yes I tell them before I start).

Last night I was scorned, ridiculed, made fun of just because I did not know what I was doing in my very first Boss fight, even after informing them of my new status to this game.

[Nafka]

Part 3

Having anxiety like I do this was a huge blow and I started to second guess if I should play this game at all. I play MMO's to experience the story and exploring, im not in it for the endgame raid all the time stuff like most. My fried who plays as well who introduced me to this game and gave me the refer a friend code was very supportive and told me that there are many grievers in this game when it comes to Dungeon/boss stuff.

After that I took a break and did it again and got a better more understanding group. But it still weighs on my mind so I guess im wanting to see what other people think or suggest.

Now of course since this I starting reading more about my class but as I can tell I was not doing that much wrong (BTW its hard to find guides and info on this game any sources would be great full).

So what do you this, yes you reading this especially if your a veteran of this game or been playing for a while now.

[Nafka]

Part 4

So as I said im wanting to hear what you people think or suggest I do when this happens to get over my anxiety, because as far as I can tell your main story quest involves lots of these Dungeons and Boss fights (which im sorry to say is unfortunate)

Thanks in Advanced people :-) (sorry about all the post they limit you on what you can say)

[Eye_Gore]

Part 4suggest I do when this happens to get over my anxiety

Start drinking, heavily.

Sadly we hear this all too often. All we can do is hold our head high and press on. Don't let the donkey's ruin your fun, sure its tough to ignore, but you need to. Tanks get alot of grief, either we don't know what we're doing, we're called prima dona's, people will think we hold groups hostage due to our short que times, we get it all. Why anyone would take this job on under their own will is beyond me, we do have a screw loose and it helps. We are not right in the head, to willingly accept any and all abuse and keep pressing on, makes us who we are. Do your job, do it well no one will bear mind to you. Mess up once, and you will be remembered. Keep up the good fight.

FYI, editing your post after you post it will get you by the character limit.

[Culfinrandir]

I was in exactly the same situation as you with severe social anxiety. I had my Gatherers levelled to 50 and my Summoner at way over level 40 before I even did Ifrit as I feared entering social content.

You will meet both the best and the worst of people in this game but, no matter how much it burns (and it DOES burn) when you get called out just take a breath and realise that they can't harm you in any way. They're probably socially inept & suffer from a wide range of issues.

Stick at it, you will overcome. X

[Whiteroom]

Gladiator is pretty rough going until 40, and tanks get more flak than anyone. If you are suffering fom anxiety as bad as you say, it may be better for you to level a dps class first, or along with tank. That way you can run the dungeons first as dps and learn how each dungeon works before tanking them.

For dungeon guides, I like MTQcapture on youtube. Some of her guides are pretty dated, but she is very clear and concise in her descriptions. You will at least get an idea of what you are heading into.

[Belhi]

As most of the others have said the main thing is to remember that you will run into jerks in the game but in the end they really hold nothing over you and often have issues of their own.

The only thing I would suggest if your uncomfortable is to perhaps try levelling a dps Job first. You can play all the Jobs on the one character so it doesn't require you to make a new character and you can switch between the Jobs whenever you want to tank again. A DPS Job however is generally lower stress. This isn't to talk you out of tanking. If you enjoy tanking stick to it. Its just that tanks tend to be more the focus of attention and that can make people nervous playing them.

[Shadream]

As someone with social anxiety and introvert (great combo for MMO's :P ) I say soldier on.

I have also played lot of MMO's and have more then one time wonder why consider that I'm not having the best background for playing with others. In most of them I have been able to avoid groups most of the time since few demand you to do groups, but this MMO are a different beast.

I also main as tank, but have been stuck on crafting the last weeks since its just so much fun, but I will be back on my GLD soon. I have done the 3 first dungeons and 1st Primal allready. Was lucky enough with the groups, but know that sooner or later I will get some a-hole in a future group.

So why play a MMO with my problems and at the same time a role that are the one that stick out most? Because this game is fun, I'm a FF fan, I allways wanted to play a tank and most important.....I want to change.
Change from someone that jump 10 feet in the air just because you got a message from another player, to someone that can work within reason with other people at least in the game.

So stick to it and if you get a group that are not working for you, then you allways have the option to leave it. Most times it will hurt the group more then you since they now have to wait for a new tank that maybe never will come and they will have to abandon the group. All because they could not take time to be more friendly.

I also advice to check out Mrhappy1227 on Youtube. He have a nice Let's Play for beginners that will give you a look on most dungeons before you run into them. He play mostly as healer, but It do help. Also check MTQcapture, also on Youtube. She are great on strategy for tank's.

''I fall, I rise, I make mistakes, I live, I learn, I've been hurt but I'm alive. I'm human, I'm not perfect but I'm thankful.''

[Rufalus]

Some people are just mean for little or no reason and it's very sad and disappointing. But there are also some very nice people here, and a really great game.

Just do your best to brush off bad comments. Everyone has been through the same experience of taking abuse, especially while new and learning.

The people who say mean things do the same to everyone, it's nothing personal, it's more their problem. You can't realistically be expected to know everything instantly.