I can tell you right now, if you tried to go into an EX Primal farm or into Coil as an ACN with Topaz...if the leader thinks you may have been doing something and mistakenly clicked go he would ask you to change to SMN with Garuda or Ifrit. If you say you want to go as ACN, you'll almost certainly be kicked. If the leader feels you're a troll or just is not in the mood to put up with your BS, you'll get kicked and blacklisted, and likely your name will spread to others he knows to not let you into parties.
If you're trying to cover for healers with your spells, you're wasting your DPS and frustrating the healers, especially those who know the fights extremely well and how everyone should be. You can cause DPS checks to be missed or phases not to be pushed in time, neither of which is a good thing and, if it doesn't cause an outright wipe, just adds to healer stress (and the stress of the party as a whole)
Using Topaz (or Titan) is akin to you saying that you're needed to keep the party alive (nevermind the fact that the pets cannot Provoke and don't have terribly good AoE aggro); you lower your DPS to focus on keeping your pet positioned and holding aggro. Then there's when Topaz does steal aggro and throws the boss in circles, ticking off melee who can't get positionals off and healers who can't actually heal the pet reliably (I'm sure you ask the healers to heal Topaz too when it has aggro).
Pretty much, you're telling your healers and/or tanks that they're bad, can't be trusted, and that you are here to save the day. Which is a very bad thing to do, considering DPS are common enough that you are entirely replaceable almost at a moment's notice.
As for the big reason why you will always fail (and you will) at using Topaz in any serious content? DPS checks. Pretty much, by doing that, even without the "my heals/tanks are bad" covering you like, you're asking to be carried through content, forcing others to make up for what you do not bring to the fight. And unless you're paying some millions of gil, people don't like to carry randoms through stuff.
If you're in a group that allows you to use Topaz, fine, go have fun. In the DF or in someone else's PF...you're not getting any sympathy for your actions
The "I play as I want" excuse (and its is purely an excuse) only goes so far...and group content is not where it flies, where "majority rules" is the rule to live by (with randoms anyway). Sure, you can try to play as an ACN with Topaz, but its just as much the group's right to tell you they don't want you because you're failing at your role. You'll never be able to match a SMN in terms of DPS, and won't be able to fill any other role without royally ticking off other people.
Are you sure an MMO is right for you?
EDIT: Here's something you likely have no idea about: there are several end-game tank killers that either outright kill pets or completely ignore pets. Now, the latter doesn't mean the pet eats it to no effect, it means the attack pretends the pet doesn't exist. Look at Turn 11 for a good example; Main Head/Secondary Head will never target a pet, and if you have no Provoke ready that means that whoever is hit with Headlights will die, which gives stacks of Damage up to the boss. And since the attack does a base of something like 8K-10K on a tank...an ACN is highly unlikely to survive it (probably has a base of 13K-15K for a caster, without Headlights) should they cross-class Provoke.
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