DPS display could easily be solved with a system already in game.

[Massterchef]

We don't need to add to that with a parser.

They are already used by any PC player that wants to know their own DPS which happens to be a lot of people. Where is the chaos and shaming en mass that you are talking about?

Excuses aside, you are just afraid that people will be able to identify your poor play with proof. Is it any surprise that you just completed second coil last month? Which would suggest you don't attempt content when it's relevant or have any perspective on DPS checks.