Entitled DPS, please stop being entitled

[Ceodore]

Putting words into my mouth again I see. I was doing my routine DD pull, and chose to spend a little time on thinking on how to react to his abuse inside the crystal buff while we fought, offered him compromise, and he shot it down. How is that rude....? Is offering compromise or taking a moment to decide what to say to his blatant abuse rude? Not the optimal reaction one would have, but I am not perfect. And there you go again, personally insulting my intelligence :/

He requested a full run, telling him how to play his class isn't compromising anything. It's telling him how to play his class. As others have said, it's simply your lack of communication, and apparently quick thinking to reply before beginning your "slave" work.

And again, you're failing to understand my context. I was equating a tank's role rights of pulling mobs to an authority's rights to have a more valuable opinion on their subject. I did not contradict my statement. Do you see the "as a person" in that quote? Do you know what that means? It means I'm saying that the authority's value as a person is not superior to the others' values as people. Everyone has the same personal rights. Their opinions on their subject (as a tank's choice in playing their role of pulling mobs, as a surgeon's opinion on surgery, etc) is more valuable than others' opinions on it (a dps' choice in pulling mobs, a photographers' choice on surgery, etc). Hopefully this clarified that for you. Also, you still fail to prove that point. A PLD and WAR both fill the tank role in a dungeon, and you do not have to know how to play one to play the other. They're both going to tank either way.

Yes, they are both tanks, but they are vastly different in their play style as well as their capabilities. Your ignorance on one does not make you an authority on all things tank. It only makes you an authority on your class. You really shouldn't assume you know a role without knowing the other ways that role can be filled. I would be willing to say I know my way around both, since I main both, I clear FCOB turns as both (not at the same time, obviously) and so I generalize my knowledge by saying I know my way around tanking. I still learn things occasionally about them, but there is very little for me left to learn about either class anymore. You generalize tanking as a Paladin as if it covers all aspects of tanking. But you'd have no clue which bosses are effected by Holmgang's Bind, or the prime moment to make use of its 1 hp save effect. Would you have any idea the synergy that spawns from using Bloodbath with Vengence, or Convalescence with Second Wind? So my point is, you aren't an authority on tanking, you're maybe an authority on being a Paladin.

You think there can't be compromise on a full clear? So, me asking the dps to AoE when he wanted to single target isn't offering compromise? You're the uninformed one here.

This isn't compromise, it's called telling someone how to play their class. You're telling them how to dps instead of changing the way you want to pull. Just because you like it one way doesn't mean there aren't others. I change the way I pull based on the dps I get when I queue. If my DPS are more single target based, I pull fewer packs. This assures that they can maintain TP and that the Healer can then chip into DPS easier. If I have mages or a bard, AOE is plentiful, so I pull more packs. Just because your healer can heal through 10 mobs beating on you for 2 minutes doesn't necessarily mean you should do that. Pull a little less, free up your healer to cleric stance dance, and thus higher dps and faster pulling.

Also, I am typically a quiet person. I also think before I speak. You know what my first reaction was when I was made into a slave immediately? "What is your problem dude?" is what I wanted to say. I controlled myself, and instead chose to get the first kills out of the way and talk to him during that before deciding what to do next. And I was reasonable when I talked to him. Also, I didn't know that about that dungeon. I haven't run it in a while. Thank you for bringing that to my attention however. It still does not justify the demands and attitude and slavelike treatment of me exhibited by him, and still in no way means that I wasn't going to pull the mobs in those rooms, especially given the compromise discussion. Also, he was not new.

You keep throwing out the whole "slave" thing, which is getting annoying. You aren't a slave, you had every right to do whatever you wanted, which includes kick, leave, or vote abandon. You aren't in shackles, you aren't slaving away. Either man (or woman) up or stick to a role where you aren't suppose to play leader. Also, if you're quiet, or you can't make these decisions on how to handle a situation quickly, I suggest the same thing. You have a tank, if you plan on playing, plan on being informed, talkative and quick to make smart decisions. This really isn't a role for the timid or the reserved when you are the one charging head first into the fray. If you want to stand behind someone else, stick to BLM.

Looking at his profile on the lodestone now, he has multiple 50s: WAR, WHM, NIN, and now BRD. He also bragged that he has all 3* crafts, not that that is combat relevant. But it points to him being in the game for a while nonetheless. Even if he had been new, what I was asking of him was not unreasonable.

And yes, you are being hostile. Want me to name some examples of direct insults you've made?

You assume your feelings are of some great importance to me, and you assume wrong. I have been very judgmental, and I stand by that, and whether my judgment offends your delicate feelings isn't my problem. My aim is to educate you so that you might actually be a better leader as a tank by pointing our where your flaws are and let you know it's your job to correct them. You came to the forums crying foul from an experience you had with a dps, so you have invited scrutiny and judgment onto yourself. Defend yourself all you like, but you are becoming offended at the very scrutiny and judgment you invited. Just because you want people to sugar coat their comments doesn't mean they are going to. Learn from this, it will help you a lot if you ever decide to make another post here.

And again...I did NOT DEMAND ANYTHING. I was immediately shown disrespect and demanded of....how are you continuing to get from this that I demanded of him and disrespected him first...he lost some respect from me from his first statement and treating me like a slave, but still, I was willing to give him what he wanted...

I never said you demanded or disrespected anyone first. I stated that you responded to his demands and his disrespect with a lack of communication first that could come off more as ignoring him all together. Again, I revert back to my previous statement, you need to be less quiet and more spoken if you're going to "lead" anything. Your lack of comment, followed by your actions of pulling only the things in the hall to a spot typically used for speed runs and first room clears sends the wrong message. Speak first, responds when spoken to at least. Your loss for words for a response in this case then was your own issue. If you had to think of a response for that long, then I suggest thinking faster, or better, knowing ahead of time what you should do in such a situation.

I know you think I'm rude too, or that I'm mean, but honestly, I'm just blunt, and straight to the heart of the issue, especially when there is talk about the privileges or rights of the role I specialize in. There are far too many tanks who give the role a bad reputation already for another one to come along and worsen it. Yes, we are the "leaders" "first in the fray, last one out" "protectors" "healing target number 1" etc., but that also means that while we know we are important, assuming that that importance gives us any more rights or leverage is simply inviting pompous high horse riders to give the rest of us tanks who actually develop a friendly and kind reputation a terrible stereotype. I'd rather you come away from this thinking more of how you could have handled the situation differently to create a friendlier environment so that you could garner a better reputation on servers beyond your own. Whether someone else is being rude or not doesn't matter. How you present yourself as a tank is what matters. Keep a level head, keep calm, but be fast to think and fast to react appropriately. Yes, you had a bad experience, and probably several if you've finally snapped and come here, but this isn't exactly the best place to come to appeal for sympathy.

No, see, I don't think you understand.

I lawled