Yes. Yes it is fun. It's fun to get together with seven people and take on a challenge. The first time you set foot in a turn, it's fun to watch all the ways you fail. I can't tell you how many times I died to things like autoattacks in T13 while our healers got used to the insane amounts of damage that are heaped on the main tank. The entertainment there lay in the fact that the boss would then go to the highest DPS and obliterate them with Flare Breath or Flatten. People ran around and carried on ("Noooooo why meeeeee? The bard looks tastier, eat him!") as the boss ate the rest of the party one by one, often with them actively trying to get each other killed and be the last man standing.
You all die in the end. Okay! You can't view every death as a failure to clear. Instead, you should view every death as a learning experience. The fight resets and you buff and start again. After a few tries, you don't die to that same thing anymore. You learn to deal with that thing. You progress. You die to something new that you hadn't seen before. Sometimes it's frustrating when you slide backwards and can't get past Phase 1 for some reason. Sometimes you need a break. If you enjoy the challenge, you will eventually come back to it. Soon, you make it to a milestone point in the fight where you can start learning the final phase. For T9 it's Heavensfall. For T13 it's Teraflare. You see that and you think to yourself "Oh boy, shit just got real." It's the home stretch in your learning process. You know victory is close.
Funny story, the first time we got to Heavensfall I murdered our entire party by standing in the wrong place. Nael dives down on the MT, and out of nervousness and a bit of confusion I stacked on the party because I didn't remember what to expect at the phase shift. They all died, and I was left fighting the boss alone. There was a chorus of "What the..?" and "Oh shit!" then laughter as the boss ate my face. I made a very obvious blunder. You know what? I've never made that mistake again. And yes, we had fun with it. They still occasionally tease me for it to to this day.
The first time we got past Teraflare in T13, both tanks died seconds later to the first Akh Morn because both of our healers were already dead. It was inevitable. We 100% knew we were going to die to it, but we wanted to see the mechanic anyway. It helps to get an idea of things like what it looks like, the timing of when it happens, and how fast the individual hits go off. It's information that helps you next time you get there. Bahamut obliterates both tanks, eats the rest of the party, and then we reset the fight and pat ourselves on the back for a good run. We died to something new. We made it further than we ever did before, so let's do it again. We know we can, because we just did.
Eventually you start to learn how to deal with it when Shit Goes Wrong™. That's when you know that you aren't operating on simple rote memorization, but that you truly understand how the mechanics actually work. In any case, it's not about beating your head against the content. Yes, it will sometimes feel that way but usually that's a case of being hungry or tired or cranky about something else and just needing to address the other problem. We take a break, we get a snack, if people are tired we wrap it up for the night. Those of us that enjoy the raid content will come back over and over again to learn it. If you want something, you have to go get it. Clears aren't going to be dropped into your lap. If it was easy, it wouldn't be so rewarding to beat it. Let me tell you, getting your first clear feels like a million bucks.