The key I have found is getting people to play with; after that things fall into place. Just get your friends to play and find one or two folks who already play the game then you are golden. Instances are easier and late game is easier... Sure things have to be done solo in some cases but having friends makes it better and the solo aspects are not bad; Square has made them great enough to make it not crush your soul by having to grind the main story quests solo.