Has anyone figured out the duty finder requirements for queue popping?

For the past month, my husband and I normally try to get in each others trials by queuing at the exact same time with the same classes. It used to work.

I'm noticing now that when we both queue at the same time, on his BLM his queue is almost always instant (or will pop within the first minute). Mine is always within 5 minutes (5 ilvl difference). I tried queuing a full minute before him on a trial, thinking we were competing for eachother's spot, and his queue is always first.

I've noticed also, today, I was queued as a PLD for tower and ended up spending 61 minutes in queue before quitting. My husband queued solo as well as his PLD (worse ilvl) and his queue was 5 minutes and it popped.

Is there some sort of requirement now that I'm missing? Ilvl requirement? I can understand melee share the same queue, but it's getting very frustrating that I spend hours in queue, despite being a healer tank or dps.