Looking for an active server

[Nici]

XIV Soul should never be used as a source.

OP, you want to see which servers are most active? Just take a look at which ones are not available to transfer to during most of the day. It's those.
You'd have to get up in the wee hours of the morning to transfer to them, however.

^This...i recommend Balmung and Excalibur...they are really great servers and active, the Balmung community is especially great...made an alt there awhile back and as WinterSolstice says try in the wee hours, it took me several days before i could make a toon on balmung, Good Luck OP...hope you and your wife find a nice active server you'll be happy to play on.