For everyone's busy or not around: I would change FC, or change servers if nothing happens, get into a LS (you can ask in shout)

For the experience clears: you can setup your own party with party finder, and you can even say that all loot is yours, that you are progressing etc.. those that join u agree to your 'rules' (I know, very silly)

It's not 'easy' but It's doable. I work 60 hours per week, I sleep 21 hours per week (joking) I can devote around 3-4 hours per night (EST) so that's about 15-20 hours for the weekdays unless I'm busy, and I have weekends, when I'm not busy, where I can put 10 hours lets say.

I know the feeling of the 50 HQ items, I will check 2.3 recipe to see what's worth to meld in order to get those, but no rush.

There is about 20+ quest just today to start, that you cannot feel bored. As per catching up, someone mentionned that you can get into syrcus tower to start getting that iLvl100 gear, which is up-to-date with about 80% of the people (RGN here )

It just turns down to: do you like the game enough to get back in and play a job that you like?

It's all about the FUN, not being the number 1 on the server, specially if you don't have the time to invest.

Good luck to you.