It's also a matter of content and context. I suppose I should preface this with the fact that I only have MNK, PLD, SMN, and SCH at 50, but I am leveling BLM at the moment. I can only speak for myself, but I find myself moderating myself more or less depending on what the situation is. If the tank is having a hard time keeping hate in a normal dungeon I worry less about self-maintenance. From my experience on healer and tank, I know I can kill a single monster before it becomes a danger. If, on the other hand, we are fighting a big group, or a Primal/Boss, I will be much more careful to maintain an appropriate hate level. Though to be honest, even at level 40, this is already somewhat difficult.

As a fellow PLD, one thing you may want to consider though is Flashing more. It's kind of boring, and I at least never feel like I'm really helping out much when doing it, but it will give you a nice solid enmity buffer against incidental damage. At least enough to get control of the monster that got away.