Being Gendered Correctly

[Mcshiggs]

You know, for the number of folks going, "It's just a game," none of you seem to realize that it's kinda shitty having to deal with the exact same shit I deal with in real life in a game.

Ah I understand now, I hate when stuff happens in game that I hate in real life, like this morning I was running some simple chore for someone, and a fish person hit me with water, I walked slow for 20 seconds, damn I hate when that happens.

To those who keep saying "Well they don't know" I already suggested using "They" which is gender neutral, third person, and is in fact grammatically correct as both singular and plural.)

Since we should go by what can be grammatically correct, if we are referring to your character, realize that the character is really just a bunch of pixels, so calling you character it would be just as if not more correct than referring to your character as he, she, or they.

[Skivvy]

You know, for the number of folks going, "It's just a game," none of you seem to realize that it's kinda shitty having to deal with the exact same shit I deal with in real life in a game.

Maybe you all have a blast dealing with the shit that sucks in your life in games but I don't particularly.

Very few of you have any idea what gender dysphoria is like, having never experienced it for yourself, so you see the triggering of it as either something I have control over (that's not how it works) or the dysphoria itself as no big deal (it really really is). So, maybe instead of telling me to just deal with it, recognize that some people have to deal with shit that you don't, and try to be considerate of that.

You are admitting that you have a disorder. For better or worse, this one is on you to try to work through. You have some issues being associated with the term "he", and perhaps it's time to try to work through that so that you can cope better in this type of situation vs. expecting an online community to stop referring to anonymous players as "he".

Also, you're also a lala, and unless you never wear a hat, female Lalas are incredibly easy to mistake as a male. Especially when viewed from above floor-level. -.-

[infinitezero]

inb4 thread closed and accounts banned due to harassment

[SarcasmMisser]

Wow people didn't know that Kim is a common Korean male name? Way to leave your American exceptionalism unchecked, I'll have you know that many Korean males WERE hurt by assumptions that they were a woman and consequently being called the incorrect pronoun. Tumblr WILL hear about this.

[ninthfantasy]

I get called "he" all the time. I used to correct it to *she but now I never bother. Obviously it's not as offensive for me as it is for OP, I really couldn't care less what gender they think I am.

[Araeya]

So, you're asking that all players be referred to as the gender their character is so that you are not misgendered. Has it occurred to you that it would result in people who play characters of the opposite gender being misgendered? What if they have an issue that causes them to be as bothered by that as you are? You could request the general usage of "they", which is actually grammatically incorrect since it's plural, so could that then somehow offend those who have something akin to DID? The only other unspecific pronoun is "it", and I can't imagine you'd like to be called that. So, is there a solution that makes everyone happy, or do people need to take in the reality of the situation and in turn have realistic expectations? The bottom line is that these are not people who have any knowledge of you whatsoever. They aren't calling you by your birth name. They aren't seeing you and still calling you "he". They know nothing about you. If anything, you are not being misgendered. In this scenario, it's actually your character being misgendered, and that character is make-believe. Would it bother you as much if they said you have a different hair color, or race, or creed? It's a video game. No one is threatening you, harassing you or otherwise intentionally mistreating you. I'd say that's on the minor side, and it is your choice to take it seriously or not to.

[Gilraen]

Look, ultimately you are going to realize like many others that constantly correcting people in how to speak to you is going to be more effort than it's worth. I used to correct people about how to refer to me but after the umpteenth time with only the barest of changes in how the discussion continued afterwards I felt it wasn't changing anything to make the distinction and just let the conversations flow where they may. I spent too long fretting over the inconsequential when I could have just had fun. But, as a parting thought, how often have you met a man with a girl's name? I don't mean a man undergoing gender reassignment, I mean just a man. More often than not it's a rarity and is almost always greeted with, "Wow, you must hate your parents." (a male relative of mine was named Billie, yes with an -ie, and was picked on alot as a kid, so that should tell you something)

[Kimmy_Dee]

To those who keep saying "Well they don't know" I already suggested using "They" which is gender neutral, third person, and is in fact grammatically correct as both singular and plural. (Not to mention, half the people in this thread haven't bothered with decent punctuation and you're gonna argue proper grammar is of importance in the game?)

[RumiP]

To those who keep saying "Well they don't know" I already suggested using "They" which is gender neutral, third person, and is in fact grammatically correct as both singular and plural. (Not to mention, half the people in this thread haven't bothered with decent punctuation and you're gonna argue proper grammar is of importance in the game?)

Took me a while, but now I'm convinced it's troll. Got me.

[Titor]

To those who keep saying "Well they don't know" I already suggested using "They" which is gender neutral, third person, and is in fact grammatically correct as both singular and plural. (Not to mention, half the people in this thread haven't bothered with decent punctuation and you're gonna argue proper grammar is of importance in the game?)

"They" is very much only plural, look in any dictionary. The correct phrasing is he/she. I'm asking this completely in a non sarcastic and very serious manner manner: would you prefer people using he/she? I do use that sometimes, but not always. I wouldn't mind using that more often, but when I call people generically "he" I mean no offense to anyone, it's kind of a catch all, similar to calling humanity "Mankind"