First off, why can I only post here? When I try to post elsewhere it tells me my primary character's level is too low (39 is too low to be allowed to post outside New Player? Well, maybe that's part of my problem ...).
FFXIV is my first MMO (unless you count Defiance, which I don't). That said, I've been playing games for over 30 years, and, while I'm not the best at multiplayer, I'm definitely not the worst. I've yet to find a game that I could not figure out on my own.
I know a Tank is supposed to attract the enemy and thus keep hits off of the spellcasters. I can generally do this, even though it seems that Healing tends to agro disproportionately.
However, I fully admit that, probably due to the lack of years of experience at paying attention to others, I'm not quite as quick on the uptake to note that enemies have slipped by to attack the casters - a bit tunnel-visioned, which I'm working on. As soon as I see this, or when some mentions "healer getting agro'd", I'm on it, but sometimes they do slip past.
It baffles me that a healer would spend more time attacking than healing, and blame the tank when said tank falls down ("You took too many hits"). It also baffles me that the same healer would not mention they're being agro'd, instead complaining after that "You didn't take my hits".
What is worse, when I ask for suggestions, I get answers like "Do the same thing you've been doing for the first 25 hours you played the game" (What? 25 hours to get to lvl 39? I've been playing when work allows since the game came out - conclusion - I must suck). Or even better "How f*ing hard can it be to take the hate?" (this is them to me, like Tanking should be something any dummy can do) ...
I would say that "I can't be THAT bad, after all, I got to Brayflox", but I know that is BS - things do get harder, and lack of good strategy becomes much more impactful as things progress (and maybe I've lucked out up to now, getting teams that made up for my suckiness).
So, I guess what I really need is a Beginner's Guide To Tanking (or MMOing in general), and maybe to be able to find some players who'd be willing to not act like a$$es and tell me how much of a duma$$ I am for not knowing what I've never had the opportunity to learn before.
Any suggestions are welcome. I expect a few insulting ones too - I've read other hate-mail here and on other boards that show the disdain casters have for a tank that lets them get hit. However, I hope a few people can give me some useful advice and not just waste words building enmity.
Thanks for reading.