Is anyone else scared of dungeons or trying to progress?

[LiadansWhisper]

You can blacklist people as you please (Though that defeats the purpose of it being an MMO). Hell you can turn off alliance/party chat if you wanted to and just play the damned game. You can make friends and play with them, nobody is 'forcing' you to get verbally abused. The fact is that this is an MMO played by people around the world; you will run into people that you do not like. Making a conscious choice to run away from mean people on the internet is just terrible advice, and letting them win is the worst thing you could do. Going into a duty finder group and expecting everyone to be angels is just extremely naive.

Okay, so that's your point of view. You're entitled to it. If that's what helps you get through situations with incredibly verbally abusive people, then more power to you. That tends to be my tactic in dungeons, too, although I have a good deal more power as I can just let the jerk die repeatedly and refuse to res them.

That said, what works for you won't work for everyone else. No one should ever feel that they have to expose themselves to people who make the game unfun for them. No one should ever feel that they must put up with someone treating them like trash because "they should just grow thicker skin." No, sir. No. The person being abusive needs to stop, and if they won't stop, the person being abused should have the tools to protect themselves from such a person.

Judge not lest ye be judged. Calling people asshats and mouthbreathers certainly does not help your problem. You are making wild assumptions and generalizations about people you don't even know. This is an extremely poor way to play the game or to view life.

Sweetheart, if someone is so lost in their own personal lives that they feel that it is acceptable to treat another human being - whether on the internet or not - as though they are less than human, to verbally tear them down and grind them into the dust because of a video game, then yes, they are mouth-breathing basement-dwelling antisocial asshats. There is never a reason to treat another human being that way, and certainly absolutely no reasons in this game.

"This is a game" is a poor stance to formulate an argument with. Basketball is just a game, but if you do nothing but double dribble and foul out, then you're not going to get picked up for the next pickup group at the gym, and your team certainly wouldn't be happy with you. People have standards and they hold you to them because they expect some degree of ability. The only difference is the threat of violence in the real world is replaced by verbal communication in the virtual world. There is no separation of skill and ability levels in most virtual settings, which leads to these kinds of conflicts. Not everyone is born to be a teacher, nor are they obligated to spend their time to teach you.

There's a world of difference between "having standards" and being a jerk. I have standards. I've always had standards. I get pissed off and annoyed when I'm dealing with people who don't do their own due diligence for an encounter. I don't like raiding with people who make 0 effort.

However, this does not and never will translate into my having the right to treat them like crap. If there's a way to rectify the situation such that the person who is the issue can be helped to perform better, then I try to help them first - because everyone was new once. But someone is grinding my gears enough that I'm going to lose my temper, I leave. There's never a reason to verbally abuse another player in this game.

This isn't about standards. Making the excuse, "people have standards," is, quite frankly, complete BS. You can have standards and not be a jerk. You can have standards, and not verbally abuse and troll other players. "Having standards" doesn't make someone automatically be a jackass to those around them.

And nothing you may or may not achieve in this game will ever give you the right to mistreat other players. Nothing. No one here - or anywhere - is "pro" enough to have the right to abuse other players. Period.

[TeaTimeBear]

I type way too much

Oh stop it, your text walls are beautiful!

[Royze]

You won't experience this kind of thing if you stick with a group of friends and support each other, be patient with each other and grow together.

However, other problems will arise. You will all get too efficient as a team for your own good. And soon you will be clearing coil T1-T5 in under 90 minutes, Extremes in under 40 and be left with nothing to do for the remaining 6 days and 22 hours.

Thanks for killing my FC and static Yoishi. They all quit out of boredom.

Cooldowns and Lockouts:
For Cooldowns & Lockout people say: If they didn't enforce lockouts people would be out of things to do very fast.
Reality: I'd rather enjoy racing to the finish line and afterwards have nothing to do, than be bored and frustrated over a prolonged period of time and the entire journey.

[Vandawg]

Im one of those abusive people...just so happens I enjoy being an ahole but to be fair I expect to be abused back...its fun and its teh internets so its okay. Stop taking things personally no one is saying your a baddie irl....most people are referring to the character you play

and if your terrible you deserve a little grief. Have a little confidence in yourself and stop crying when someone calls u out.

There just as many emo qq people in this group as their are griefers

[Kinnishiwa]

Okay, so that's your point of view. You're entitled to it. If that's what helps you get through situations with incredibly verbally abusive people, then more power to you. That tends to be my tactic in dungeons, too, although I have a good deal more power as I can just let the jerk die repeatedly and refuse to res them.

. . . . . .

And nothing you may or may not achieve in this game will ever give you the right to mistreat other players. Nothing. No one here - or anywhere - is "pro" enough to have the right to abuse other players. Period.

I'd totally have your babies for this wall of text. If I was straight, and was sure you were old enough, and a woman . . . .

[Noahlimits]

Im one of those abusive people...just so happens I enjoy being an ahole but to be fair I expect to be abused back...its fun and its teh internets so its okay. Stop taking things personally no one is saying your a baddie irl....most people are referring to the character you play

and if your terrible you deserve a little grief. Have a little confidence in yourself and stop crying when someone calls u out.

There just as many emo qq people in this group as their are griefers

"most people are referring to the character you play"

wat. I can't believe how much I'm using this image today.

[Archona]

Like I said, you should be kind, and its nice if others are kind, but nobody should be so naive and think that EVERYBODY is going to be kind, ever. We haven't achieved world peace. Conflict is in human nature. The tools to prevent verbal abuse are there already to anyone who wants to use them. A large part of playing MMOs is making friends who share your goals and values.

Telling the players who are scared to remain scared is not good advice. Build confidence, develop thicker skin and these problems will vanish. Hiding in your hole and waiting for the rest of the world to change is terrible advice. Nobody has the right to tell anyone how to play or act, period, as long as it is within the confines of the games' rules and terms of service. Don't like someone? Report/blacklist them, and never play with them again. You paid for this product, so either learn to enjoy it to its fullest, or stop playing it altogether (and let those bullies win). Simple as that.

Preaching altruism and utopian ideals is nice, but it is in no way realistic and does not address the needs of the 'victims' here.

[LiadansWhisper]

Oh stop it, your text walls are beautiful!

:-P Your flattery will get you nowhere!

----------

I'd totally have your babies for this wall of text. If I was straight, and was sure you were old enough, and a woman . . . .

I'm totally a 12 year old dude. No lie. You believe me...right?

-----------

Telling the players who are scared to remain scared is not good advice. Build confidence, develop thicker skin and these problems will vanish. Hiding in your hole and waiting for the rest of the world to change is terrible advice. Nobody has the right to tell anyone how to play or act, period, as long as it is within the confines of the games' rules and terms of service. Don't like someone? Report/blacklist them, and never play with them again. You paid for this product, so either learn to enjoy it to its fullest, or stop playing it altogether (and let those bullies win). Simple as that.

I don't think that's what anyone is saying. Others were offering similar opinions as a way of letting the OP know, "Hey, you're not alone!" But most people were offering to help ("Hey, come to my server and I'll help you out!") or advice on how the OP can get less scared, or find help for dungeons so he or she doesn't feel so alone and scared.

---------------

As with everything, there are two sides to this.

When the majority of us queue for any sort of content we do it with the intent to finish that content. Now, this is obviously a game and fun is all well and good. If you want to CT in your reindeer suit, have at. But some players just don't try. They want to be carried. They join Titan in crafted gear with no melds (pre-DF ilvl reqs.)and keep queueing until they find 6 or 7 other folks who can drag them, kicking and screaming, through the content.

In my personal opinion, whatever verbal abuse those folks take is well deserved. They're wasting everyone elses time.

I haven't really seen that. The bulk of what I've seen has been one or two people behaving like jerks. It's not that people go afk, it's that people are deliberately trolling the entire raid and getting away with it. And they verbally abuse everyone around them.

[Lurkios]

As with everything, there are two sides to this.

When the majority of us queue for any sort of content we do it with the intent to finish that content. Now, this is obviously a game and fun is all well and good. If you want to CT in your reindeer suit, have at. But some players just don't try. They want to be carried. They join Titan in crafted gear with no melds (pre-DF ilvl reqs.) and keep queueing until they find 6 or 7 other folks who can drag them, kicking and screaming, through the content.

In my personal opinion, whatever verbal abuse those folks take is well deserved. They're wasting everyone elses time.

[SendohJin]

I played FFXI, and saw just as many toxic people as here, so people stop needing to use that as a reason.

this game has a lot more servers and i have no idea how you go about counting "just as many".