How do you deal with a rude player in DF?

[Dale]

Unless it was your healer that was being rude, you're punishing the wrong people/person.

This.

Please do not take your revenge out on the whole group when a single party member is being a jerk. It's not fair to the rest of us.

I can't tell you how many times a tank has let me and the rest of the group die on purpose because of what someone else was saying. Being collateral damage sucks.