Harassing Healers - or: Please allow Parsers

[BigRed5392]

Tanks are generally the last to be kicked in an instance because the group is all but guaranteed a 10-30+ minute wait for a new one, assuming they’re running content that is still relevant. People put up with a surprising amount in DF- its a rare event that people kick small pull tanks, zero dps healers, or even subpar dps. Unless something is very obviously wrong (blizzard wizard wrong, dropping meteors on the party multiple times wrong, purposely getting locked out wrong) most will slog through the duty with little more than the occasional sarcastic remark.

If your girlfriend, a tank, the hardest role to replace in a party, is getting kicked or fought with regularly in DF, something is amiss. If this occurs/has occurred DAILY (for months!) I am confident that this is on her.



For reals. I feel bad that she she as ASD/ADHD. I feel bad that she felt so bad about a run that she cried.

But it takes a set amount of people to accept a kick, and if she is kicked regularly than people regularly find her a big enough problem to cut.

you do know that it only takes 2 ppl to kick in 4 man. And it can simply be a friend to kick. I didn't mean to convey she is getting kicked a lot, but harassed a lot. And only to show case how rude and vindictive this community can be, and how assumption is the instigator because of stress over player made rules. I met and dated my g/f for 2 years on ff14, and party with her regularly. we was just fc mates at the time. I moved her im, june first of last year. With that said, if my g/f WAS the issue I'd be the first to tell her as she trusts my judgement. My g/f in these cases will show me her chat log, and ask if she did anything wrong. And imo she doesn't. She does her best, and i support her.

True... I've been reading silently for a while, and at first I had a lot of sympathy, but the more he says, the more it seems "she is completely silent except for nitpicks and people didn't like it." She would probably have better results just saying what she thinks is wrong instead of questioning them out of nowhere. Like the regen thing on tank before pulls. Lots of healers don't realize it makes it a pain to establish aggro. Why not just say that instead of a very generic and easily misunderstood "Why you do this?"

It honestly just seems like there was lack of communication from both sides and she's blaming them for it, and they decide to just kick her instead of sorting it out lol. People forget that other players are not mind readers, so if something can be taken offensively, it will be.

She was raised to be kind, and point out a person faults is rude. She asks questions to NOT ASSUME, as she feels people make mistakes and don't realize it. She isn't nitpicking but asking. It is to open up the door to communication, you know like an adult. It is the way this community acts, that people act like this. Which is also what I was pointing out. People assume everyone else is rude, and treat people nasty, and do vindictive things like refusing to heal, tank or dps.

She rarely asks questions, only if it is a repeated action or making the run slow, or is making her job hard. My g/f has been playing since CE launch of 1.0, had multiple characters/jobs at the 50/60 cap.

Again we never have issues on tonberry. If it wasn't for my work schedules we would still be over there.