It is your Fault!

How many times have you been told you sux at healing. Its your fault we wiped.
Etc..,...

I just now tell them uh what I dont understand you. I dont speak A$$hole?

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Originally Posted by Zormikal

I just now tell them uh what I dont understand you.

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This thread

Only one time stands out in my mind. It was during the second boss when they're bombing everyone like crazy, BLM got hit by back to back bombs even though I told everyone to keep moving during that phase. Well he dies, and then blasts me for not curing him after the first bomb hit. I explained to him that I was being targeted too and have to move but he didn't wanna hear that and dropped out. We got a rep right away and finished it in no time.

The thing is, some people rely too much on the healer to the point where even we have to dps to get through a boss or so while healing might I add. It's like they rely on healers so much they just be like, I want to do my own thing. What ever. If I die it's the healers fault. A party is supposed to be team work. If some one who isn't tank pulled agro there are many factors as to why it happened depending who it goes to. And if the mob is way too much, like I know there are tanks out there that just keeps pulling non stop with out killing the first mob first... if it's way too much for your mama pool to handle speak up. If there's a bard, ask for mp regen.

The thing that bugs me the most is when people say, "There's not enough heals!" When both healers in the party, our mana pools are just almost and if not completely empty trying to keep everyone alive. If you are going ALL out on healing and controlling your hate points then... either dps suck at controlling agro, the tank has a hard time controlling agro, might be under geared, dps is taking too long to DD, no one is grabbing adds, or they just can't dodge.

I've never had anyone point fingers at me, but I know there's been cases where having a tank die was my fault and I take the fault personally and try to improve for the next time.

Blame centers around Tanks and Heals more than it should. Its your fault the Tank died if you misjudged when to give him a heal and it comes too late; if he gets a pile of enemies on him and his health drops faster than you can replace it... maybe there are other factors at work. If you run out of MP and haven't been wasting your heals topping people off... maybe there are other factors (like standing in the big red cone!).

You're often the last line of defense to stop mistakes from snowballing into a wipe, but by the time it reaches you it can be too big to expect a person to deal with.

No one yells at the DPS because they're using an inefficient rotation and making the boss battle 20% longer. But if the Healer has to dodge a cone and misses his last chance to stop someone from dying...

If you had enough people yell and complain to you that your healing is sub-par often enough to the point where it drives you to make a thread post, wouldn't you think they might be on to something?

Had a tank tell at me because he died while trying to pull mobs up to the top cannons in CM. I was like... I can't cure you when you're across the map.

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Originally Posted by Kryzen

If you had enough people yell and complain to you that your healing is sub-par often enough to the point where it drives you to make a thread post, wouldn't you think they might be on to something?

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Considering the number of assholes who like to play the blame game more than FFXIV, no, I don't necessarily think anyone is on to anything.

Healing is tough and you're going to get blamed even when you feel it's obvious that it wasn't your fault. It'll get easier to ignore the douchebags, and in the meantime, try playing with your FC or other people who might be more patient when it is indeed your fault.

I don't really get blamed, people usually point the blame at DPS for being hit in the first place. =s

I have never been the blame of healing "directly". I have pointed out my own flaws (maybe that has detracted the others from saying something) but, generally I am not to blame. I have Purposely not healed before though.. where I sleep adds (yes, On whm I do USE my ability to use water > Sleep on adds if applicable) and they keep waking them up. well, have fun buddy because I won't be curing you anymore till you die or kill it.

As to what Crystalfire808 said, Healing is tough. Then again so is Tanking. You got to look at it from everyone's PoV as no one really has it "easy". Just do the best you can with what you got and I am sure that you will get better, as I told someone else who was asking about coil : "turn 1 - 3 is basically AK / DL gear + mechanics checks. If you think you are don't need to improve, you are wrong. Always think see that there is a way to improve something in your rotation, whether it is healing or DPS or Tanking.

If you think you've maximized it, almost 98% of the time you haven't. Go all out and don't hold back, if the PT wipes, just learn from your mistakes and get back in there and win it the next time. EVERYONE can improve in some areas, never be afraid to ask how you are doing and where you might be able to add more Dmg or something into a fight."

I main heal as White Mage. some stuff is DL, some is Relic. I consider myself one of the better healers. I make sure that everyone is topped off but I do NOT make sure that everyone has stoneskin or repeat stoneskin on a tank as I see it as a waste of MP. MP in longer fights is too precious to just waste on a 1-shot stoneskin that blows up faster then a virgin. (bad analogy, I know :| )

I have seen many healers do this and it baffles me. I have also seen Many a healer use cure non-stop and ignore the Free cure 2 where it would've benefited them more. I have also seen off-healers SPAM the shit out of cure 2 and cure 3 and then beg for a ballad from the Bard. If you can't conserve your MP better imo, You don't deserve ballad at all. I play with a hardcore Bard who feels the same way, so maybe he has rubbed off on me a bit, but I generally don't have MP issues, even in turn 4 of the coil unless I have to spam heal the Tank *which is understandable*.

Generally speaking, you will get better and if they said you suck well, just take it for what it is and say "I can do better, I will do better" and get better. You can do it, because you know you can. Don't worry about the little morons that blame everything on everyone else. Just do your job and handle it well. :)

Lol only one time stands out. I had joined a group that was already in progress. Bard was standing in a melee position of mobs that aoe. He dies. I remind him that he is a bard and should move back.

Of course he goes I should shut up and learn how to heal. He goes on and and says I should leave or I can leave if I want too. Calling me a fail healer like the other one that left.

I stayed to prove him wrong. The tank and blm were quiet but I had a feeling they were all together because they were both doing really stupid stuff. No one died.
After we finished the bard was like, not one hit. Basically I didn't dps while they were doing stupid stunts. I got a few hits in when it seemed like everything calmed down but whatever. I just laughed and went on my merry way. Run was fast and I got the myth I needed to +1 my weapon.

One other time, I was completely new to prae and it was a speed run. I don't really care about that one as noobs need to learn and I did. XD

Have you ever tanked?

I've been told I'm a horrible tank 10x more than a healer...and then one run later have a whole team asking if I'd like to set up a static with them. As a healer you're either the first- or second- most visible link in the chain and if the chain breaks sometimes you're going to get blamed. Shrug it off or roll a red class...

I've been accused of being bad by people who don't avoid AoE or know where to position for which bosses.... I don't bat an eyelash at those people.... if they aren't' standing where they should be standing, and refuse to take advice on where they should be, It's out of my hands... I can't cure stupid.

Ofc I have been blamed of screwing it up. But that was not even 10% of the times I actually screwed it. Most of the times it was a wrong decision whom to save and who not to. And it´s ok if the one who died and was more important is annoyed.

But I guess ist about those cases ppl just flame first to not get target of flames. Just answer them "Contributers first." They´ll ragequit and you are better off.

My favorite is when Tanks SR WP undergeared and pull large groups, then blames the healer when they can't keep up with their heals (Swiftcast Holy at the start included)

My solution: Press "O" => Hit "Leave" :]

The iron rule of MMO's. If the Tank dies it's the Healers fault. If the Healer dies it's the Tank's fault, If the DPS dies it's Tank,Healer or Lag if they can't possibly place the blame on the other two XD.

But in seriousness i don't really pay attention to whiners if something wasn't actually my fault. On occasion it is i have nobody else to blame if i have a noob moment and get knocked off by the Demon Wall or something (Happened like two days ago and i think i will never live that down XD) but at times you will get yelled at but you just shrug it off. If you have to choose between saving yourself and somebody else you always pick you since you can't heal if you're dead.

More than the blame game lately the thing that bugs me most is people telling me what to do and when. Like if like 4 people die from being morons then i'm trying to get things under control since we lost the second healer too and while i am doing this my chat box is spammed with "Res me" "Rez" "Rez" "Healer Rez" "Do you even have swiftcast?" "Rez healer" "Healer use LB" "Rez" "Rez" "Healer do you have swiftcast or not?" "Rez" That is VERY irritating when i'm trying to concentrate and avoid a wipe. If you got yourself killed you should eat floor and shut up. You will be rezzed when there is a window for it and it's safe. A lot of people don't know when it's safe to raise and will do it right away so if i do it at the wrong time they will just die again straight away. And before all that i have a duty to make sure the people who stayed alive will be able to carry on.

Back when I was first starting to speed-run CM, I'd often get blamed when I couldn't heal the MT because I was focus-bombing myself from having 5-7+ adds on me that no one seemed to see fit to pick up. <_<

Though I'm leveling a DPS right now, and my pickup is amazing on my Dragoon. Anytime we're in a 4-man dungoun and I see the mob going for the healer, I'll po Blood For Blood and Internal Release, three-hit combo him with a garunteed crit on the third hit (Bit of a waste on DPS since internal will still be up, but worth it for the threat.), and peel hate while deactivating blood for blood from myself and activating Keen Flurry and Featherfoot. I doubt any of the healers I run with notice that I do this, they just notice that I'm self-healing / not taking much damage, but I'm always happy when I can let my healer focus on targets that aren't beating their face in.

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Originally Posted by MXMoondoggie

More than the blame game lately the thing that bugs me most is people telling me what to do and when. Like if like 4 people die from being morons then i\\'m trying to get things under control since we lost the second healer too and while i am doing this my chat box is spammed with "Res me" "Rez" "Rez" "Healer Rez" "Do you even have swiftcast?" "Rez healer" "Healer use LB" "Rez" "Rez" "Healer do you have swiftcast or not?" "Rez"

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Lol! This makes me laugh. I\\\\\\'ve had my share of deaths in end game content so it feels pretty good when I can outlast everyone and manage to keep the party from failing. Sometimes denying people a Rez is what it takes.

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Originally Posted by Eidolon

I doubt any of the healers I run with notice that I do this, they just notice that I'm self-healing / not taking much damage, but I'm always happy when I can let my healer focus on targets that aren't beating their face in.

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the WHM's should also know their own defensive abilities. If a mob is in their face and they are being hit, they can use water > Swiftcast > Sleep or just Water > Sleep since water gives a what, 6 second? bind effect and if the mob can be slept well then there ya go. you got at least 20 seconds of safety and the other mob(s) may be dead by the time it wakes up. you can repeat it a few times with dwindling results as resistance builds up but by then the pt should be already on that mob.

I've had a healer that couldn't quite keep up before. I usually don't get onto them, because I also heal and I know how crazy it can get if a tank doesn't keep all the hate. People need to wait it out before deciding someone is inadequate at their job.

I've been blamed for everyone dying as a tank when I knew it wasn't true, but there's been a time when it was true, so I know both sides.
Everyone gets a little defensive because they all assume it's a little their fault, I think.

I wanted to start being a dps just so no one would yell at me lol.

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Originally Posted by MXMoondoggie

while i am doing this my chat box is spammed with "Res me" "Rez" "Rez" "Healer Rez" "Do you even have swiftcast?" "Rez healer" "Healer use LB" "Rez" "Rez" "Healer do you have swiftcast or not?" "Rez" That is VERY irritating when i'm trying to concentrate and avoid a wipe.

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Lol had this just last night, was helping a friend with Garuda story with a PUG and the MNK died in the last phase of his own doing for not moving, he kept spamming over and over REZ!, REZ!, REZ!, I just ignored him at this point the group was not doing so hot in the end we are winning and about to win I start casting Raise he says "NO REZ just win!" my tank was full hp the blm was full hp I got him up and everyone won ALIVE. STFU you want to do it, you pick up the shiny staff and do it yourself, while I am your healer, fasten your seatbelts, keep all hands and arms inside the ride at all times and enjoy the F$#@ing ride. Phrini knows best k thankz bai.

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Originally Posted by Kryzen

If you had enough people yell and complain to you that your healing is sub-par often enough to the point where it drives you to make a thread post, wouldn't you think they might be on to something?

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On too something perhaps they are onto attacking mob that tank isnt on .
Or maybe the dps is onto something when he pulls agro instead of tank.
Or maybe someone is onto something when they break sleep
you could be onto something

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Originally Posted by LaLiLuLeLo

I've had a healer that couldn't quite keep up before. I usually don't get onto them, because I also heal and I know how crazy it can get if a tank doesn't keep all the hate. People need to wait it out before deciding someone is inadequate at their job.

I've been blamed for everyone dying as a tank when I knew it wasn't true, but there's been a time when it was true, so I know both sides.
Everyone gets a little defensive because they all assume it's a little their fault, I think.

I wanted to start being a dps just so no one would yell at me lol.

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A healer that couldn't quite keep up? As in, you died because insufficient heals? Both a Tank and Heal fault. Healer couldn't put out the numbers, but only until death Tank's would realize they couldn't cut a mob that big.

I'll point a finger at a Tank when aggro just keeps being lost when I heal. Last night I had a Warrior who seemed as if they were only able to hold aggro on one target (I'm not too knowledgeable on Tank works so I'm not sure what they were doing), I could point fingers to the WAR because it seemed that way.
But I've also rolled with a PLD friend and he couldn't keep up because of one dreaded thing... I had a relic, he didn't. Despite how much he tried to pull aggro, we were going neck to neck - I was keeping him alive and he was struggling to keep aggro. The differences in gear can be astonishing. He said it was hell everytime he had to party with people who had a relic.

Though of course any healer who spams Holy or something and then blames for aggro.. that's just their fault lol!~

As a DPS though you will get yelled at :p
I don't think it's people getting defensive it was their fault, it's the opposite. People getting offensive that you should be doing things X way when we should be adapting to another's play styles, not fighting another.

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Originally Posted by Zormikal

How many times have you been told you sux at healing. Its your fault we wiped.
Etc..,...

I just now tell them uh what I dont understand you. I dont speak A$$hole?

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The logic is very simple. We lost because we died. The healer is supposed to keep us from dying. Therefore, we lost because the healer sucks.

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Originally Posted by Conradus

The logic is very simple. We lost because we died. The healer is supposed to keep us from dying. Therefore, we lost because the healer sucks.

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The logic is very simple. We lost because dps over aggro and got damaged. The tank is supposed to keep aggro and dodge AoEs. Therefore, we lost because the group sucks.

Fact is, a wipe can caused by many things, don't just place the blame finger toward the healer.

Actually it's never ever the healer...ever.

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Originally Posted by Asdamine

The logic is very simple. We lost because dps over aggro and got damaged. The tank is supposed to keep aggro and dodge AoEs. Therefore, we lost because the group sucks.

Fact is, a wipe can caused by many things, don't just place the blame finger toward the healer.

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I'm not endorsing this logic, I'm just reporting it. This is how those people think.

if its my fault then I just say "my bad"

if not then i'm like "you failed the r-tard check, l2 dodge" if the said person keeps on then he loses healing privileges

proceed to watch the world burn

If someone gets all micro-managy with me, I just stop talking. No point in arguing with someone who feels the need to criticize everything you do. It's extra annoying when the person attempting to 'give you advice' is not very good at the job they are actually playing. After the run is over, I politely leave. I don't need to run with people I do not like... that's the beauty of MMOs!

I don't think I've ever been blamed for a party wiping (on healer), although there are times when people expect more out of me than is possible. I find it particularly funny when DPS die on Titan and blame the healers. Yeah, I totally could have kept you alive when you were hit by a stack of plumes. I'm a miracle worker. My favorite occurrence when I was healing Titan was when a bard kept dying because he didn't come close for Medica during stomps and would continuously get hit by plumes every single time. Yes, it is a healer's job to 'make up' for DPS mistakes by tossing you a cure... buuuut, the tank and other healer comes before you. So stop getting hit. I like when DPS apologize for getting hit. It's nice. But I don't actually expect it.

I've only had an issue with one PUG healer, was quite awhile ago. She was obviously new, and was spamming AOE heals like mad every pull. After the third set, I simply asked her to ease up on the AOE heals. She replied that healing is hard. I replied "I know, just do your best :)". The next pull was a little easier for me to manage, and the rest of the instance was a cakewalk.

Some people want to help, and some are just looking for a reason to rant. Many just plain don't know how the game works.

All any of us can do is filter out the useful input, and let the rest sail past as useless babble. Complaining or feeding the rage won't help anyone do either.

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Originally Posted by Conradus

The logic is very simple. We lost because we died. The healer is supposed to keep us from dying. Therefore, we lost because the healer sucks.

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Hyperion again........wow, you make me so proud to be on that server!

That never hapened to me as a healer. But yeah some ppl are just plain ignorant (Like Conradus). It'S not always the healer fault if there's a wipe (Most of the time ppl don't know that you SHOULD evade an AoE (Oh really?!) If you run out of MP because you didn't menage it, yeah it's your fault. If you run out of MP because ppl can't evade dmg and the BRD is not Wise enough to cast Mage Ballad.. Why should it be your fault? Ppl need to blame someone... anyone! It's always either the tank or the healers fault tho (Even if the Dps really screwed up)

I dont cause wipes, if we wipe I blame the others for not doing their job, I'm a good WHM, sorry if I sound cocky, but it's true. :P

Zero Times.

It happened to me in Stone Vigil once - but it WAS my fault. I was the one that couldnt seem to get out of the way of anything.

I got told this once in a pug Stone Vigil. As background, the tank only spoke Japanese and couldn't hold threat on more than one mob (probably because all she did was her single-target rotation on the one mob, and flash to hold the rest, which predictably didn't work).

So we were doing the pull with the 3 Avies, and the tank died because she had 1 of the Avies (and was taking ridiculous damage for only having ONE mob), and I had the other two (which I couldn't Repose, of course), and I couldn't keep both myself and her alive through the damage.

DPS (I forget what class he was) was yelling at me for being a bad healer for not keeping the tank up. I guess he missed the other mobs beating on my face? I told him he could heal himself, since he was so good at it, and proceeded to not cast a single AoE spell for the rest of the dungeon, nor heal him directly at all. Every time he died, I left him dead and refused to raise him.

Which probably makes me a really mean person, but that dungeon was absolute hell and I was too busy tanking all the things the tank apparently didn't know how to tank.