Party overstepping my personal boundaries in duties

Tried to delete my thread but it wont let me delete 1st post. I dont get the option for 1st post.
Please forgive me for a messy looking thread now.
Ive deleted my other posts in attempt to stop the thread from going on.
Admins. Please delete or close this. I've done what I could to remove it myself.

What you're experieincing isn't about you, it's part of some heal prioritization schemes (but not the only ones) for healing in 8 man content.
For example, one might prioritize healing in the following partly-humorous order:

1. Oneself
2. the main tank
3. the other healer
4. any one else who can do a rez
5. the DPS that seem to be doing there job well (like by not standing in the bad stuff) and therefore hasn't died yet this fight
6. the off-tank if they are doing their job and not just acting like a lame DPS
7. whichever of the off-tank and the remaining DPS has the best glamour
8. everyone else

This list may change depending on how likely you think the group is to nearly wipe, but generally, the other healer will usually be near top. It's not just professional courtesy, it's an acknowledgement that oneself can die sometimes and having no one alive to rez oneself when that happens makes for a boring duty and often a wipe.

A myriad of different situations can pop up that make it seem like a good idea to throw a heal or esuna on you, regardless of your own role as a healer.
If a big chunk of unexpected damage is dealt to a co-healer on a trial and I'm playing a healer myself, I'll find it pretty natural to toss an oGCD heal their way. I don't think there's any intentional disrespect involved whatsoever, just a group of players trying their best to watch out for each other and cross the finish line together.

This is an incredibly stupid thing to be upset over

As a healer main I've experienced this myself (and also guilty of doing it). I wouldn't worry about it - it's not intended to make you look like a bad healer or any reflection of your abilities, just everyone working to keep the party alive and going.

If I see my co-healer drop to less than 50% health I'll stick a heal on them (assuming no other pressing things to do like raise/heal tank or dodge some nasty mechanics) as I want to ensure they stay alive to assist with any healing/raising required. Again, if everyone gets hit by debuffs that need removing, I'll just start chucking out Esunas making my way down the party list accordingly, thus allowing the co-healer to concentrate on healing, raising, or dps'ing. Unless I'm mistaken (last I checked, been a while since I played it), WHM has the highest dps of all healers at present so your co-healer may be trying to help you so you can keep dps'ing for max damage output?

One question I will ask is - do you inform your co-healer to not heal you before the fight starts? If yes then I can see why it would be annoying, if not, then can't really blame them. .

AzizaToinette, assuming you're not talking about a static, I think you are expecting way too much from a DF pug of random strangers.
Most if not all of the other players are just going to play as they play, without regard to any requests other people make.
They'll heal, tank, and DPS according to their own habits and preferences, not yours.
And all they or most anyone else cares about is clearing the content expeditiously, not the performance of a bunch of people they may never run with again.

If you are talking about a static, OTOH, then this is a problem you and the static need to come to terms on, or you need to find a new static.

I don’t really know how to explain that people just do what they generally do in a party, if a healer sees their cohealer drop low they will just instinctively heal them (unless they strongly trust each other which doesn’t happen in PF), it’s nothing against you it’s just how they play

I’ve been a healer main since this game launched and I have completed basically every raid that has ever existed and I still instinctively rezz someone the second they drop even if the SMN/RDM/WHM is better equipped to perform the rezz than I am, it’s just instinct at this point

Quote:

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Originally Posted by AzizaToinette

I raise immediatly too if its safe but its not the same as heals. And the real problem is that people dont listen when I ask not to be healed and 5-10% is not even low hp. Fair enough they usually do it but it bugs me they wont stop when I ask them to let me manage my own health. I show them the same courtesy letting them handle on their own. How to explain those people so they will listen?

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You don't, you get over it and move on

This is how you make a troll post. Real quality stuff.

You will not be able to change the meta on how players play. If its casual content, its already muscle memory and they wont do anything different.

You work down the prio list as a healer, which starts at keep healers alive ... or maybe keep tanks alive, those 2 could be interchanged. So unless you min max or really know the content, in most cases you will get topped off by an aoe somewhere.

Same with Esuna stuff, just remove it, once if yours is done go down the prio list. If you want to add your own special rules to things, theres always Partyfinder. If theres dps and healers at 60% hp after an aoe ill pop an aoe heal, if theres debuffs that need to be removed ill remove em and if you get clapped by a mechanic and suddenly sit there with a stack and at half hp, chances are i throw something insta at you.

Not to spite you but to ensure no follow up makes you sit down, because a rez is the last thing you want to use in combat, its a lot more expensive then throwing an extra heal.

Trying to talk to the average DF person is like herding cats, in best case they can read the chat never hope they can also comprehend what you say.