New players, are you okay?

This is not a call out post, rant, or anything negative towards newbies.

I just did Soul of the Creator in my roulette and we wiped three times due to healer deaths, lack of healing etc.
Someone in chat pointed out that the Astrologian didn't have a sect on at all, saying 'Ast, use Nocturnal Sect'.
You can actually use the sects in the middle of the encounter if none are active.
After that inevitable wipe, the Astrologian left without a word (and our MCH pulled so we had to wipe since we only had LB2 available). Nobody said anything bad or complained.

So here I am asking to all new players who experience this: 'are you okay?'
It seemed like they were upset, but as a long time player I did find myself a little bit annoyed at the circumstances.
Do level skips/job skips unlock all Alexander raids?
Did this person manage to level Astrologian all the way to 60 without having done a single quest to unlock Diurnal/Nocturnal sect? The quests require that you use the sects and Aspected Benefic (I think) so it would be assumed at level 60.

I've noticed this happen often, actually. I've even seen stuff like this in savage raids, and when people point out a very, very obvious mistake the person in question gets really upset and either lashes out or leaves the instance.

I can fully understand how scary it is being new, and maybe people have no idea what they're getting into when doing these raids. However, FFXIV has an age rating of 16+ (or around that number) so I do expect more mature behaviour and these overreactions and possibly traumatising experiences (for them) worry me.

Is simply saying 'stance' enough to ruin someone's day?
Is this what people mean by 'toxic casual'?
Are we wrong to point out something that is causing the duty to fail?

And of course, if people have valid reasons for these mistakes or lack of knowledge (disabilities, age, etc.) then that is fair, but it's also not something that other people will know unless you tell them. Letting your party members/alliance know that you're new or have a disadvantage is fine because people can help!

People get offended/upset too easily. New or not, there is nothing wrong with nicely pointing out to a player that they forgot to use their stance. It's when you are condescending or mean about it that it becomes a problem. If they are doing higher level content, they should have a basic idea of how their job functions.

Don't pick a healer if you aren't going to at least heal with oGCDs and minimal healing. If a player does not know how a job works they can read tooltips and practice on a dummy. There are also countless resources available online, including guides and discords that players can utilize to learn a job.

There is nothing wrong with being new or having difficulties; the best way to remedy this is to ask questions, practice, and learn. We were all new once.

So we got a lot of people with anxiety issues that play this game, I think. When they get called out, they run away from the situation, because they envision it snowballing into a shitfest where they get all caps'd shouted into a hole for sucking.

A lot of people are sensitive like this, even high end raiders. Though the high end raiders that have anxiety or sensitivity to being called out are more liable to argue back even if they're wrong, to try and save face.

To avoid flight or fight responses, it's best, even if it's a bit annoying, to not call attention to a single person, even if it is their fault. Just say a generic statement like, "Everybody got their stances on etc.?" Even if it's pretty dang obvious that nobody except the MT and other ASTS even have stances to think about, by making the command a blanket statement to the group, the individual doesn't feel as much pressure.

It's really dumb, but we're still dealing with our stupid monkey brains.

I've heard that those types of people will try to go report you as well. They'll see as "harassment" and try to get you in trouble. If that makes any sense.

For the vets:

If someone makes an obvious mistake like not activating an action or performing a job mechanic that has been part of the job for the past 30 levels, the appropriate thing to do is tell them they've made a mistake. If you don't, they will continue to make that mistake for another 30 levels.

If a non-party channel is available, I would bring this up in the non-party channel so they have a chance to fix their error without anyone in the party seeing them being told how to fix their error. If it's a channel with other members besides the two of us, I'd simply say the action name with no indication of whom I'm directing it to.

However, in the vast majority of cases, this is impossible because the person making the error is a stranger and duties lock you out of tells. Therefore, you should never feel bad about telling someone to fix an obvious error in a duty by means of a politely worded question or instruction in party chat. Exs:

• Forename (Action Name) (Do you have it?)
• Forename (Action Name) (Please use it.)
• Forename, if you use (Action Name) you'll easily be able to keep everyone topped up for the raidwide AoE at that part.
• I know (Fire III) looks like it does more damage because its potency is 33% higher than (Fire), but it takes 40% longer to cast, so you actually do less damage if you spam it. Just cast (Fire III) once to switch back from ice, then spam (Fire).

As long as you word it without being a jerk, there is no universe in which a GM will consider it harassment.

Feedback is an important part of the learning process. People can't fix mistakes that they don't know are mistakes, and if someone does something wrong but is never told that its wrong, they will assume its notwrong and continue to do it.



For the novices:

If someone tells you to fix something using polite wording, trust that they know what they're doing and want to help you perform your job more effectively, which will reduce stress for you and make the game more fun for you and everyone else in that party and your future parties.

Don't get defensive, especially if you're playing your job based on information you got off the internet, as in many cases you'll be working with dated information that stopped being applicable years ago.

That said, if they come at you like total jerks, then report them. If you don't, they'll continue to be total jerks to the next twenty novices they party with.

There might also be another thing that is quite new : The game is now free until 60.

You know which crowd was susceptible of not being able to pay a base game + monthly automatic subscription (this part in particular) ? Young ones. So they likely try out now than they can with a lot more ease of access.

So I suspect the game nowadays also attracts a lot more young players than before, players that are less confident, less enclined to talk / answer in chat or on the opposite spectrum, go full troll / rage. And regarding the level of play, there's usually no issue with their skill, however the issue lies with the way fights in FF are build : they don't require skill, they require focus. And focus is not a known quality for quite young people (I'm talking about a 10-12 crowd).

This is mostly targeted at 4 person dungeons - but after being in a few where "newbies" have and haven't learnt things, this is my take away...

I think you are trying to be polite and concise in how you are phrasing things, but I don't think you are being polite for the recipient.
I also think 'vets' as you call them need to remember that for some people this is a casual game where they may only play a couple of times a week and be newer to MMOs.

Advice

If speaking with somebody that's the same language I often start off by saying something like

"<name>, <class> is one of my favourites! May I offer some advice that I found extremely helpful and bumped up my <dps|healing>"
Occasionally followed by
"If you're unable to type, please jump once for yes, twice for no!"

By putting it in their hands to say "Yes" I find people more accepting of advice. Especially if you can relate that you too were in their place once.

Also - it's a game. Being told what to do or how to play your class is not fun for the receiver and I don't find it polite when I read it. If they say "No", they likely weren't going to listen to your advice (you may be lucky and they would have looked into it afterwards).

Controller/console players
Whilst on PC you may have all your spells/skills visible (and clickable) at a moments notice some console/controller players will have what they consider their main skills on the minimum amount of cross hotbars.
I'm not offering a solution to this, I'm just saying this can be a reason things like Sects may not be noticed.

Boss Mechanics
Regarding mechanics, not everybody is going to go and watch a trial/dungeon guide. They want to experience it first hand, see if they can figure it out themselves.

I find if you have a new player bonus you can offer "Would you like me to explain the mechanics, or would you like to try it first?"
You may be fine, get through it and they would've worked out most of it by themselves. They might get stuck and say "What went wrong?".

Alliance raids - Inform your party of mechanics. "A - adds, B - belly, C - chains" means nothing if it's your first time. If it's not your first time, you probably already know the ABC.
i.e. Scyrus tower: "Reminder: If you get purple tether, please run to X, if you get fireball, bring it to frozen player if possible! :) ", "BTW When he casts Curtain Call, get behind some ice!"

COMMUNICATION
If possible, communicate. Not everybody has keyboards, but you can work it out. If you're tank and unsure of healers abilities, ask "Med/Big pull?", if no response, try medium pulls and get bigger.

You can make or break peoples experience in this game with how you communicate.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by ShivahnuAhnJura

I can fully understand how scary it is being new, and maybe people have no idea what they're getting into when doing these raids. However, FFXIV has an age rating of 16+ (or around that number) so I do expect more mature behaviour and these overreactions and possibly traumatising experiences (for them) worry me.

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I can only give my opinion for someone who hasn't really played much at all in the past year. I come back, have two days of "I'm gunna set all my stuff up and lets play some FF!" then a week later I get busy. (new baby, lack of sleep, studying for certs etc..)

I came back this time and stuck to my guns. I wanted to play tank but didn't because I remembered nothing. I was turned into a frog more in one week than I have in my entire duration of playing (since 1.0). You do feel a bit embarrassed, and each person has their own reasons.

For me I know people take time out of their day to play this game, and time is tight. So I don't like to waste their time, or mine. At the same time I remember having people be just nasty when I would mess up on mechanics. To the point of threatening me that they'll find me and my family.

So that sticks with you. Some of these were people well beyond the 16+ range.

I also felt that everyone else would be better than me, and assumed they were all familiar with things. Oh boy was I wrong! I had a tank who had the ilv requirements to get into the original Vigil but the gear didn't match up. (the ring that gives an xp boost up to 30. Level 1 - 5 gear on them etc...) and they pulled EVERYTHING. We died and he blamed it all on us saying that he will pull slower for us. And at first I thought it was me. I mean I still have stoneskin on my hotbar. Then I saw his gear, how he pulled and his reaction. I realized this person isn't light years ahead of me. That, for me, calmed me down.

I also think that people hear a "tone" in their heads when they read. I know at my work I'll type something to a co-worker and someone will share with me a screenshot of that same person saying I was being mean. Yet when I tell them the exact same thing over anything with my actual voice, they're fine.

Some just don't want to take advice. I know people at my work when you mention you can do something else to make your work day a lot easier, and they get very defensive. "Well I'm just trying to be a team player here. So how was I supposed to know?"

I don't think you're being toxic. It's just how people are depending on how they feel towards the situation.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by hamgooof

COMMUNICATION
If possible, communicate. Not everybody has keyboards, but you can work it out. If you're tank and unsure of healers abilities, ask "Med/Big pull?", if no response, try medium pulls and get bigger.

You can make or break peoples experience in this game with how you communicate.

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This also. I play on PC and PS4. I only have one keyboard, so at night before I go to bed I like to play on my PS4 and forget my keyboard. And there was at least one instance where I know I messed up, we got through it and I left because I was annoyed with myself, rather than take the time on the controller to type something out.

For the record though, to everyone out there who still takes the time to ask new people if they need a description of the mechanics, those who label A - B - C even on older raids / trials, you're doing a lot more good than you realize. It jolts my mind back and I start to connect the dots. Or even new players, they see things and know "okay I will need to gather there." IF they've experienced this before in another raid. But it depends on the player! Some players know how to follow the crowd, even on their first time. Some..don't.

I don't know if there's an achievement for it, but the people who still do all this on older game content, you deserve a major kudos.

Could have been healer anxiety.

Or the WoW way where they just leave. Having returned recently, its worse than when I left two and a half years ago. Last 4 dungeons I did, someone always left after a wipe or not going fast enough.

Sad really.