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Since I seem to be the only person who can't download the update for Patch 3.57 no matter what everyone has suggested. It seems that I have no choice but to uninstall the PS4 version of this game.
The only question is, can I uninstall the game without deleting anything that I have accumulated to this point over the 3 years I have been playing or am I well and truly stuck with starting all over from the very beginning?
Uninstalling won't delete any character data. Only way that would happen is if you deleted your account license(via mogstation) or deleted your character.
Your settings are saved separately to the game itself (I recommend backing them up though, it's so depressing to lose them to corruption!)
But the update problem is a network settings issue in the PS system itself, nothing to do with the client. If reinstalling fixes it it's unlikely to be a direct result of reinstallation - it will just mean you waited long enough for the network issues causing the bug to clear by coincidence. You need to keep messing with your DNS settings, or connect through a different Internet connection if possible (a phone is great if you can tether) just long enough to trigger the patch download, then it should work normally afterwards.
The vast majority of your character data (characters, levels, equipment, items, and progress of various types) is stored on SE's servers and not on your PS4. So reinstalling won't even touch any of that. There is some configuration data (including your hotbars, gear sets, macros, and HUD layout) that's stored locally on your PS4, but even that's separate from the main game data.
The PS4 stores game data separately from save files, and SE uses save files to store local configuration settings. (There's one save file for global settings, and then one save file per character for character-specific settings.) When you uninstall a PS4 game, it removes the game data but leaves save files alone. While it's generally a good idea to back up save files just in case, they should be safe through deleting and reinstalling the game.
Wish you the best of luck getting your problem fixed. Afraid I can't offer much help, though. The only time I've had a similar issue it was because of a faulty router. Rebooting the router fixed it long enough to get me in. (And then replacing it with a new router was the more lasting fix.)
Well now, I have a new problem. The Realm Reborn patches downloaded successfully, but it will not take Heavensward patches.
You have 2 options at this point either reset to defult settings or factory reset. This will fix it happy 7hr download.
Happened to me twice.
You may have to try different dns settings, port forwarding and if all else fails use a VPN.
Also try the restore licenses feature, you never know.