Helping and Being Nice - Not Mutually Exclusive

I was in a CT group tonight and one alliance member was rude to some of the other players. His party tried to votekick him (the votekick failed) and then he got even more belligerent. What got me though was that he was aghast that someone would try to votekick "the only helpful person in the alliance."

He was calling people names before the votekick attempt and he was swearing excessively. The thing is, he WAS being helpful in the sense that he was explaining fights to new people. But it's silly to say you're being votekicked for helping in light of other behaviors that might be going on. I guess I just wanted to post this as a reminder that you can be helpful AND still be nice.

Some people (such as myself) would rather play with bad players than rude players. I was sad to see the votekick fail but happy when he ragequit after failing to get a confession out of the initiator of the votekick.

Oddly enough, the run went perfectly smooth without his help. Absent the name-calling, people got right down to business.

This is a good example of what I like to say: You don't have to choose between being kind and being efficient. Kindness IS efficient.

This happened to me a lot in the beginning when I was first learning this game. People would be flat out rude then say "I'm just being helpful". Calling me names and being snarky while giving me advice makes me more likely to ignore everything you've sad. No one likes being put down.

What about the people who always forget what you say when you're nice, but remember everything when you're not AS nice? I've seen people with a mindset that seems like this: "He's being nice, I must not be doing too much wrong, no big deal"

But you shouldn't be rude to those people who are taking your advice, just because there are others who wont. Right?

I never said anything about being rude, not to mention rudeness is in the eye of the beholder. There's a gray area between "nice" and "not nice", people tend to forget that and just lump it with "not nice". Like people tend to do with people who aren't overly positive nor negative. They get lumped as negative.

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Originally Posted by ispano

I never said anything about being rude, not to mention rudeness is in the eye of the beholder. There's a gray area between "nice" and "not nice", people tend to forget that and just lump it with "not nice". Like people tend to do with people who aren't overly positive nor negative. They get lumped as negative.

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True, but I don't think we're talking about grey areas. At least I wasn't. I'm talking about people who call me names while giving advice; "Flash more, idiot!", "Why don't you have defiance on? Did you buy your character?", "Don't tell me you don't know how to speed run", and my favorite: "Pull moar mobs!" then, when I do, the healer sucks and I die then everyone else dies :P Yep. That saved SO much time.